no show on the kitchen guy and that DAMN MOUSE

BUT first a word from.....ok not quite our sponsors more like our ducks.... i was on the phone with someone while taking this of falstaff .....the other one is of amelia laying her egg..... this is cause susan asked for them.

now onto the mouse shit..literally.....
remember that damn mouse that made a nest on the basement stairs? we evicted it?
did the little bastard do the honorable thing and move to Milwaukee???
did it at least move to the woodpile like normal field mice do?
nooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

the little shit moved into the cabinets from hell in the kitchen...and the RICH living doesn't agree with it as it apparently has chronic diarrhea
today while waiting for the no show kitchen guy..... we loaded the traps with peanut butter..... and watched this cheeky little bastard run around back and forth and eat all the peanut butter off the traps.....WITHOUT SETTING THE TRAPS OFF. then the little bastard sat on the trap and WAVED AT ME
right after he shit all over my freshly cleaned and bleached piece of crap particle board formica covered 'counter' (that i really a cabinet side)
he WAS WAVING AT ME
this mouse is going DOWN
he has got to die......
damn mouse already is older then god....(in mouse years) this is the same little bastard ( i would know that face ANYWHERE) that jumped in the TOASTER.....remember that?
oh man........
and the rich living thing is giving him 'gastric distress' but isn't freeken killing him
in fact he's super mouse.....able to leap tall mouse traps in a single bound....
oye
this is MOUSE WAR now
the turquoise colored poison bait didn't work........ he just shit turquoise mouse shit all over the place (maybe that gave him the 'gastric distress')
ok
the other deal is....i am typing this friday but it'll post saturday cause bernie has to take a unit for inspection, and i am going with
meanwhile the snow did melt.....it snowed just long enough (and like crazy) for me to get thoughly chilled and soaked while putting the ducks out....when i returned to house to recover it stopped.....the sun came out
the snow all melted
mother nature hates me too..... all cause of that damn mouse....i'm convinced it's all that mouse's fault

fast forward.... (remember now it's friday night for me)
bernie usually sits in his chair and calpurrnia loves to sit behind him....
he, ummmmm, apparently....... had......um...... GAS
and farted on the poor cat....while she was behind him on the chair.....
when the poor thing finally emerged from the gas chamber  behind his back, she was cross eyed, walking funny and looked like she'd been through the dryer without a dryer sheet......
heaven help me
i truly am the blooper reel for the universe's christmas party
oye