friends are different when you are older

i found that friendships as you age are different from when you were a kid
in some ways it takes longer to make a close friend when you are older, as you don't have as many shared experiences
but at the same time, when you DO connect with someone it seems to me that you connect incredibly deeply
when you are a kid.... or teenager, sometimes while your friends do CARE, they do get distracted.
but again...... friends you make when you are much older...( 51 tomorrow) they seem to just KNOW.....if you know what i mean
there is a timelessness to them

i have one friend left alive from when i was a kid..... we talk occasionally..... it's like no time ever has gone past..... we discuss her kids...... our lives...... it's so odd occasionally for us, and we laugh.....
because we remember when it was 'so whatcha doing friday night, and can i borrow them overalls of yours'
we remember us as kids..... before responsibilities and cares, and worries...... and all the deaths that took the rest of us away......

i am deeply grateful for my friends now..... the women of a certain age that can knowingly smile when i say something about my husband......or about my aching back......
the laughter from them is deep and from the heart
they have cried with me over our losing Trish

i have made new friends as well..... time will tell how and how much that deepens

i realized that i am not a kid anymore..... and my viewpoint somehow, has shifted

maybe it IS because i have lost so many people, maybe i have had no choice but to grow up.
to grow into some wisdom
to see patterns in the lives around me
to realize that sometimes....no matter what you see..... or try to say....
you just have to sit back and watch the train wrecks and just hope you can help pull out any survivors.
that last one is tough, but so is life sometimes.

life also on the surface, doesn't seem fair......

why would trish be taken from us......and jackass lives on to embezzle another day

from a soul's point of view.......
trish was done with her lessons in this life time with these people. she gets to graduate, diploma, cap and gown...........she won.......she caught the brass ring ( soul's point of view is NOT ours here on earth remember that)

jackass....he gets thrown back to see if maybe......JUST FREEKEN maybe he will learn something before his sorry hide gets scraped off the pavement

could have a LOT to do with which side of the proverbial veil you are on ......what exactly is your view point.

but sometimes......it doesn't make it any easier



vi