bernie is home

and we are dug out of the snow

we sort of missed our anniversary

i did a story board for the duck drawings, and a color chart from the new 72 color inktense set that came. (btw i love it, and the palettes i ordered, porcelain rocks)

i am having all sorts of impetuous to draw and sculpt lately, and i am struggling to come to terms with that right now.'

i have a love hate thing with it

i struggle constantly to get the stuff i see in my head out on paper or in clay.

and sometimes happy accidents happen

but i always feel so guilty when i am not working for money

right now i am not working for money

i do all sorts of things that save us money, and the savings add up to a salary

but i feel guilty about taking time out to do these duck drawings and the other stuff when i know right now i am not making money.

but at the same time, i can't seem to stop it

so i do it

life would be a lot simpler if i didn't have so much guilt about it though

really we CAN afford me to be doing this right now, but i am so used to worrying about it.

i need to stop that as it's making it a bit harder to get to the work

yesterday while bernie dug us out, i worked on a story board for the duck drawings.

and i keep having to remind me that this whole project was not about money, or sales but about going back to my roots

a 'for me' project

i have decided to do a sketch journal as well...NOT one of the 'art journals' that are composed of collage and such but my daily sketching of ducks and halloween stuff (normally for fast drawings i paint halloween on hangtags....vicki made off with one of a bat and a moon...hahahaha)

i also realized this morning in the shower, that i am longing to sculpt again.

i keep seeing a being from one of my dreams, a winged being with the most haunting eyes.... that dream was a few years ago and it is still with me and still unsettles me.

it wasn't a nightmare but it scared the shit out of me (and i am still looking over my shoulder, and afraid of what i may see outside the windows at night)

the only way for me to actually come to terms with it i think is to drawn and sculpt it

so we'll see how long it takes me to actually get to it

in cat news, thaddeaus has grown his man curls back (curly chest hair) thankfully. (that's his man curl picture above) and we are looking at i think late spring for snowy to come home

meanwhile we bought the parakeets a large rolling aviary.

and we are planning on finishing not only the duck palace but the chicken palace will be started, and maybe a kit greenhouse (we're talking about it.....and a shed too)

today we are to get the lights set for my seeds starting

and i think we will be doing a bit on the drawing end of the studio

i also started a new hat out of leftovers from all my other hats and a bit of noro

this should be interesting........................

ps: called the philly doctor again friday, still no word from her

and no test results