it's the middle of the night

yup yup a bit after 2am and i'm up --partly cause bernie is having a restless night, partly cause my head is in a total muddle

my dear friend inna ( you've heard me mention her before. inna from ingo jewelry http://www.ingojewelry.com/ and https://www.etsy.com/shop/ingodesign  -- yup that's her inna of the amazing shawl pins and jewelry) had a heart to heart talk with me about my work,  and suggested that i open an etsy shop to sell prints of my paintings (while i am looking for representation)

now i have to tell you all.....first off i am so blessed at the amazing friends i have......(you guys know who you are.... i wouldn't have gotten this far without you all)
people who've not only stood by me but been there when life dumped on our heads repeatedly.....
they are smart women too... very smart so when one of them starts to talk to me, i listen up
i don't always take their advise to heart but most of the time i do

and inna made a lot of sense today-it overwhelmed me, it moved me way out of my comfort zone....but she's right....and you guys are right
and i am going to listen

i've been moving towards selling my images for the past few years. it's a scary thing for me, because what i paint is who i am, it comes from my soul....it comes from the place that i touch the divine
now everyone has that place, some folks pray in a church....me i create.....i work with my hands
most of the time that's meant doing something like sculpting or painting, gardening or cooking.

so it's sort of difficult putting what i do out there, i took a huge leap out of my comfort zone last year when i did the kickstarter that didn't end up funded.
now i am thinking that maybe it was a good thing, although i didn't think so at the time, at the time all i could think of was how i failed...

so with that printer that i have had since last year, ( with the good archival ink technology )
this is most likely going to happen
we're going to set that printer up and test it.... now that i have the right RAW digital files of my work ( the images are blowing my mind, they are exactly the paintings)
this part i think i can do myself!

i have hopes that down the road i can get a wider bed printer, and photoshop with a really high end computer and digital drawing tablet to help but i can work with what i have now it looks like without sacrificing quality.  and the end quality is very very important to me

now i've been getting inquiries before this for paintings, which i have been turning down, as i didn't have a way to do prints until i had the paintings converted into digital files- that's almost finished now, so i can so do this.
i have a few other surprises too... i did a whole set of  'paper dolls' as well as halloween images on treat cups for dogs and for humans
i can print them too!
while i really at first didn't want to do manufacturing of product anymore here at home, (tiny house, without real space to hold supplies or do the work)
i think that for prints i can do it...
if i actually can make this work and start to grow then a new space would have to be found but for now, i think i can do this!
there is also the possibility that i can work with a commercial printer if i get to that point-
which brings a few other things up
the books i have half finished, they could happen too
they are a lot of work but they've also been a very exciting idea.
even though i plod on slowly like the turtle i am

so that is also why i'm up tonight (this morning) yes, i am worried.... about bernie mostly, but then i have all these wonderful swirling ideas buzzing in my head
not that they are actually new ideas.....some i've been working on for almost 10 years! but now it seems like they are do-able.....that maybe their time has come?

and most importantly....
i am again looking forward to the future, and starting to enjoy the present again!
and i secretly suspect......i am getting over the fears i had about my work....about putting myself out there again

and i hope the 7 people that still read me, will join me while i do this

photography success at last

FINALLY..... i have been wracking my brains and repeatedly (doggedly) reshooting the paintings
i would shoot a batch... come down to download.... check them and delete the entire mess
i finally figured out how to see them on the camera before downloading ( and being able to super zoom in so i could tell how in focus)
of course the very first IN FOCUS batch that i then downloaded got completely obliterated --- i thought it was downloading to a formatted dvd, i did run the format
but there was a different formatting program that needed to run to actually format so the entire shoot was gone!
however, now i am zipping along nicely
next stop US Copyright office to batch copyright
then packets off to agents and manufactures both by snail mail and email
 i can't wait!
i'm shooting in RAW and also jpeg format

oh and that painting is a study of a teacup, that is being done in prep for a new series.... which i have been kicking around, teapots, teacups, fruits....still life and botanicals
whatcha think?

that's my mom's china on a piece of silk i plopped on my painting table... i've never painted china before so i want to do studies to learn it (that's how i work, i do studies then go from there)

now if anyone has suggestions or comments....please by all means feel free ok?

WTF ?? totally out of focus

ok so i set up for a shoot with the new 16.1 megapixel camera that does (apparently) everything on the face of the earth, including but not limited to......sending photos to your tv, phone, printer.... with wifi
washes the dishes
turns on the woodstove
sings to the cats
hangs the laundry
however for some odd reason
i can't get it to focus!
the old camera.....3.2 megapixels ......sharp as a tack
this one........ omg my eyes are killing me
my back is too (cause the way i have to set up the lights)
and my brain

out of all the photos i've taken i got ONE in focus......from the first time i used it for the paintings
and while i have the shutter speed and ISO information
i have no idea how it came out sharp and clean ( but skewed cause the painting was of course.....not perfectly straight)

meanwhile i am sitting here waiting for the battery to recharge

so that means my new list is

a few rechargeable batteries..
a few extra memory cards
a card reader
and a ball head for my tripod as opposed to the pan/tilt head i currently have
oh and a new computer
yes ma'm ...... JUST for this special camera
(i'm thinking a desktop-no?.......i can send the photos over wifi)


until then
i am going to try and figure WTF i did wrong....oh and i am supposed to be able to check it with a zoom thing.... guess what doesn't want to work????

again life turns on a dime

well first off......virginia is now democratic again....well done to them
i am a confirmed democrat ...... i used to be more moderate until they started to try to clamp women into slavery again
so i had no choice, as i had to fight for women's rights.. so i vote democrat now

we've had some set backs here too

but we are soldiering on

i am painting teacup studies, but the plans have changed as now i am going to paint only what is laying around....
we'll see how creative i can get with the crap i either inherited or purchased along the way
so i am expecting to paint teapots sooner rather then later...
maybe this is a good thing?
i had planned the work and was preparing to work the plan...... now the universe decrees that the plan change

damn i wish for a crystal ball right about now
i think one thing i really can't stand is upheaval and change- some folks thrive on it
some like the turmoil and swirling of change.....they are able to pluck opportunities from it
for me, i am a steady plodding on sort of person.
i've learned from years and years......that i picture where i am going....and i just keep moving towards it.
that's how i taught myself to make original porcelain dolls..... how i ended up on the cover of a magazine, how i ended up writing and being published......
how i taught myself soap making and built a small business
how i taught myself watercolor......and am working towards licensing
sort of a slow and steady tortoise of a person---

so naturally when i planned on teacups and had to change it further unsettled me
but maybe it's a good thing........and switching to just the stuff i had around the house already may work out for me
i had planned on picking up teacups and after the paintings and studies were all done.....selling them off maybe with the prints of them
maybe next time.....although i can't see me painting too many teacups can you?

the other thing that i've been looking at is light fast artist grade colored pencils
and i have decided on a combination of faber-castell and caran....... that too will wait it's turn..... as will the botanical work i am planning (have been planning)

the one thing i've learned about myself is that .......i do eventually get around to most stuff  i say i am going to do
if i decide that it is really something i need to do.....eventually i do it

i don't know if it is a muse (although i refer to it as the muse) or what... but i sort of do seem to do what i set out to do

so the past few years i've set out to create a body of work for licensing..... slowly building up paintings in series
i got the camera (still trying to learn it - but i figure i will when it's the right time)
i've started to contact agents.......started getting my 99 NOs
all along the way i have crystalized where i see these images...... and i see them on flags.... cards, puzzles....... maybe even ipad/ipod cases.....prints too
journals
part of me would LOVE to produce the product myself...... and do the packaging because i really did enjoy packaging when i had the toiletries business..... i had a total blast designing a 'brand'

(i thought of it as a 'coherent, consistent line'- and it was totally satisfying to envision and then create it- it also boosted sales.... the packages were as pretty as the product was good and that still floats my boat)

so the temptation to do a whole 'product' line INCLUDING packaging is very great for me

i have an overwhelming belief.......feeling......idea? compulsion? that something, anything you purchase should be presented with exquisite packaging..... the anticipation of opening something..... and packaging so very special that you buy the product as much for that
it makes YOU feel special and you save that package....
(i have saved some beautiful packaging over the years)

it's not just me.... cosmetics....jewelry..... perfumes.... yup

anyway....this is where my brain is steering me on this very warm november evening...

i am for some really odd reason, thinking of my paintings as product and wondering if it is at all possible to get the financial backing to get them produced..... myself!

oye

happy halloween

this is my favorite time of year..it's also for me, the most magical time of year
seeing leaves change to brilliant colors.. the smells of the fall
warm sweaters, cozy fires, comfort foods

this year isn't quite as magical as years past have been-
i don't know if it's that bernie is working graveyard this year...
or is it an aftereffect of the past 18 months or what
but i'm not quite with it this year- and TODAY, at 7am asshole dickwad neighbors fired up duel chain saws and decided it was a great time to rip into a pile of logs!
i was up anyway but had planned on another 2 hours worth of sleep .......yeah that was not happening

i am however doing a lot of cooking ahead type stuff and started the teacup studies in watercolor
the first one for me proved extremely difficult
trying to get the teacup to look delicate, thin, shiny, without being a cliche......
i know a lot of folks like the study when i was finished but i'm not sure about it

ok updates (these really are more for me then i think yous all cause who really cares right about how i efficiently used my leftover pork loin? )

first off i did up a small pork loin roast, low and slow in the oven, which we had the first night, thinly sliced with baked potatoes and steamed veggies
then last night i slivered it all up, part made us enchiladas with mixed steamed veggies, and my 'fast down and dirty too lazy to do it up right' cheese sauce which is simple
some stock, last night was chicken stock
cream cheese and cheddar/jack cheese
first bring the stock to a simmer, cut the cream cheese into little cubes and add it to the simmering stock.... whisking very very often.... add whatever seasoning you want, i added freshly ground pepper, some tiny bit of basil, parsley, a 1/4 teaspoon of good sweet paprika, a bit of mixed citrus zests...
and finally when the cheese was all smooth and dissolved ...the cheddar/jack mix shredded and whisked to melt/combine
if it's too thick add either more stock or some water

i used all that sauce to make up more enchiladas for the freezer .....and i have leftover roast pork for fried rice or something else....(bernie wants me to make fried rice for him but i think not tonight)

i am so going to do this again.....the enchiladas were really good

now i was also supposed to go to town to the antique flea market for teacups, as i need 5 more.
at least 5 more, i figured 2 bucks a pop and then .......i went to look on ebay and etsy.......WTF?
teacups are like 25 bucks! for the ones that i found 'right'

oye
some of the ones i also found 'right' (actually i found perfect) were like 200 bucks!
so i need the muse to sprinkle tons of luck down on me for this series....
i am thinking that maybe after i should just resell the damn cups
what am i going to do with them after i paint them anyway?

in studio news..i think i've settled on a combination of caran and faber-castell artist grade colored pencils... it's a really PITA to sift through all the BS to find all the totally lightfast ones...
really if any of the pencil companies REALLY did a totally lightfast line with decent pencils and a good range (like the pastel lines are) they would CLEAN up.. i swear

so now i am waiting for a few good sales
dick blick never discounts the faber-castell polychromos .....but cheap joes does..
blick has a better price on the caran.... and they will discount them so i am going to get a combination of them-- this is going to take a while i think

in knitting..i am still working on that feather and fan....it's about 28'' long now..... i think it's going to end up about 7' long...... it's such a soothing knit i maybe want to do a second one... in another color....something maybe.... a glowing wine or something like that? for my gray wool winter coat
it's really that nice a knit...
no pattern, just 4 repeats across of the feather and fan variation, with 4 garter stitches on either side....
it's in the jaggerspun zepher and i like it! i got the lilac at rhinebeck on a whim as it was pretty cheap, i got 600 yards... i had planned on putting a collar on one side but i may not now...
it's just so pristine in it's laceyness.....

ok that's about it
i need to go and paint, do dishes, cook......
happy halloween to you all
it's raining here of course (why does it seem to rain a LOT on halloween)

fall is here in earnest i think now * i know i have said this before *

we've even gotten some frosts!

feather/fan-zepher lilac-3needle

*** ty to jamlady*** i am hoping next rhinebeck is a less stressful on me- i was worried about the van

we got the potatoes in for the winter, i finished painting the front door
bernie is going to repair the studio roof for the moment
(we'll order more wood in about a month)
i am planning on getting the cess pool pumped too before winter
all in all except for not having room for the chicken breasts ....we're ready i think
this fall is definitely better then last fall

i am still in the process of stocking the freezer with reheatable meals.
i did more breaded pork chops as they were fast and very easy for me
i am planning on more enchiladas, meatloaf, and i am really trying hard to get things like sliced chicken and mashed potatoes with gravy in there... i'll just have to bite the bullet so to speak and roast some chicken along with making mashed and package the ENTIRE MEAL up for the freezer....
i even told bernie that i was considering making two turkeys for thanksgiving..one for us and one for the freezer as cooked/sliced

i am not doing as large a batch at a time lately, but i am still keeping up with batch cooking
i want to do meat loaf again
sauce
 and stuffed peppers too
and chicken casseroles.... with veggies- right now the freezer is loaded with veggies and cheeses!
i would like about 20 recooked meals in there.... that along with the raw but frozen food should get me through painting til the end of the year (IF i can get the 20 precooked done)

in painting, i am trying to decide if i am to continue with the arctic series or go on to the teacup/teapot still life series...
i have six of the arctic
i would need 7 more for a calender.....
i will say it was not only a challenge but a departure and something not seen every day
but i follow the muse and the muse right now is silent
i am however getting 'colored pencil' tweeks.... and i am trying to figure a way around 250.00 for the lightfast ones... sadly i don't think there IS a way around that .....except a 35% off sale
they are for botanical work....
the other ones are not light fast and i refuse to put that much work into something that will fade

ok the van....is screaming it's fool head off... there have been some problems....but bernie plans on fixing them tomorrow ...they would have been done yesterday but the tire place cross threaded the lugs so we had to rush the van there this morning to get that taken care of
we are hoping this is it for trouble with the van...
we are still kicking around the VW turbo diesel ....do we get a certified preowned...or a new one.
and which one? i HATE cars, i love vans.... suv's are ok....but really a car to me is worthless, i can't get hay into it easily... or plywood... so i want something i can haul with... even as a second car

ok.... now (which is several hours after i originally started this blog post), i have laid out and started washing in a teacup
i think i should be doing it in either colored pencil or pen/ink with colored inks washed over but i am working with watercolor ATM.....
i did the bottom defining shadow and thought to myself 'oops, i'm in trouble already'

oye

ok off i go now (sorry i forgot to actually post this post before)

rhinebeck 2013

this year rhinebeck for me was a bit ........discombobulated
first off we went on sunday
it was iffy up until we actually got into the car sunday morning whether or not we were going
there was half the venders that were there last year ( at least it seemed to me)

maybe it was cause it was sunday but even the andean band sounded somber---
on the upside
i got to see almost everyone
amy ripton was not there (a few other folks weren't either- and their absence was sorely missed)
but i finally met vicki klein in person- as well as jane's friend judy

clara remembered me which i doubted that she would ... her comment 'of course i remember you vi'
wow... that woman has some memory!- i got her new book and she signed it
and yes clara it has been an amazing journey over the years ( we do go back about 10 years now)

i got martha's address finally... i need to send her that package i have had sitting here for her for like 3 years and i've forgotten to bring to rhinebeck

i got a LOT of wonderful skeins ..... i got a tweed for bernie for a hat for him
i saw some amazing laceweights
i saw some phenomenal lacey shawls too ...one that captivated me was a old shale stole with a collar knitting on one side....which is something i'd been thinking about so i am considering as my next project....
in a silk blend... i got a nice lilac for that if i decide..... and i think 600 yards should be enough no?
maybe on size 4? although lately i am wanting to knit lace again on size 1 needles .............and knit it in silk

i am exhausted, with sinus headache to boot
rhinebeck always knocks me out and this year was no execption
we went up early- and i passed out
i'm still dead today
bless bernie for putting the ducks out for me
and making some rolls for us this morning
i was to make him roast beef last night but was too exhausted so today he'll get that

even though this year didn't have the incredible magic that normally rhinebeck hold for me
i still am very glad i went
seeing everyone was worth the trip
i'm growing old with some amazing amazing people... even though we only see each other once a year

oh my oh my

first off..... yeah, finally those idiots in washington finally did their job.
the rest of the world is laughing at us
i figured that they would....too much BIG money is riding on this....
but they better stop this shit-- this playing chicken shit......sooner not later the people that we owe money to are going to just tell us to take a freeken hike....(like china........we owe tons of money to them) and they are going to take over our country.... as they sort of own it anyway especially if we don't pay them the $$$$$$$ we owe them
and who's bright idea was it anyway to borrow from china in the first place?for what reason?

if we don't vote those idiots out next election we deserve what we get.

 this is the color of our door now-it still needs another coat-- it's the exact color of a beauty berry! i love this color purple... we are talking about the hardware color too.....and probably will go with either antiqued copper or oiled bronze... bernie sanded and prepped, and i'm painting it...it needs another coat but today threatened rain so i'll wait

i have been wanting a purple door since we moved in this house, i think it's making bernie happy too, he seems so much happier since the door became purple! the old color was a wonderful complex english plummy burgundy... but the mildew from the oil paint/moisture really did that paint in so this is wonderfully fresh for us.- i'll get another picture of it when the blue tape is off it and the hardware is oiled bronze.(remind me if i forget)

next......it's still freeken (or freekish) warm out

i lit a fire tonight but really just to take the chill off....i was pretty surprised that it's still in the 50s outside

and then there was tonight's supper....roast chicken, my mom's potato salad...and a huge mixed green and veg salad......HUGE....... OMG i scarfed that salad down so damn fast!
in another week or so i am also going to be doing a few marathon cook ahead sessions......
probably meatloaf, breaded chicken and breaded pork
possibly baked ziti, and probably more enchiladas (i like the way i make them with the veggies in them)
as i need time to paint and it would be much easier on me if the meals were just reheats
which brings me to .......

painting news,....... i finished the polish spring goddess
i have to decide now if i should keep at it for another 6 or start a different series
i think that if i had actual time to do a series without having to break for days on end, it would be a lot easier on me

i think also for the next series, i am going to actually do all the layouts prior to the paintings... which is going to be hard on me cause the first painting usually opens up the layout ideas and color ideas for the rest of the series

and on the subject of art, paintings etc....
i want to share with you all something that is deeply disturbing to me as an artist and should be to anyone that is got any ethics...
http://lisacongdon.com/blog/2013/10/my-art-was-stolen-for-profit-and-how-you-can-help/

http://jezebel.com/is-giant-folk-art-company-cody-foster-stealing-from-sma-1446015759

ok please read these blogs..... and if you can...share the links with your friends.. share on facebook ....tweet them....  whatever works to get this out.......

as self employed artists we all work even harder then normal folks.... we are our own marketing departments, supply department, shipping, accounts payable/receivable ....you name it- all while trying to keep our family lives going....now don't get me wrong, i love what i do or i wouldn't do it
(not that i am really fit for any sort of office job.... art departments were the only office jobs i thrived in)
but imagine you working 80 hours a week and your neighbor gets your pay check!
basically that's what this is
it's theft

ok, it's way past my bed time and i have to go to town tomorrow for sugar (of all things right? but it's 1.37 for a 4# bag and a daily limit of two bags-- holiday baking is right around the very warm corner)

take good care folks and i hope we all sleep better now that this stupidity in washington appears for the moment to be over

just a fast post before i go to sleep

really fast....
ok i went to town to meet little vicky for 'lunch' actually coffee and....
i should have eaten
i had taken out meatloaf that i made a few weeks ago for the freezer so i had just to make a fast cheese sauce and some mac (shells this time)
i threw everything in the oven and nuked some fresh broccoli for bernie's dinner

tomorrow is saturday (this week for me flew by) i don't know what bernie has planned for the weekend yet but i know he's got stuff to do

i really need to spray a bit...i gave the cats capstar as we saw some fleas but they seem ok today
ok
i don't know why but i am exhausted all the time lately
so i'm going up
when i wake up in the morning my bernie will be home
that's a good thing
he told me he is taking off for the holidays...the night before every holiday
so that he HAS the day with me.... i know he feels bad about how little time we've had together the past year.... as when he's home he's sleeping usually

ok i'm yawning like crazy so i have to go up

take good care

do i know how to make a mess or what?

6 gallons of turkey stock/bones/fat just exploded in my kitchen
it is my own damn fault too
i know better then to stay up to 2am and then try to function the next day
now i am trying to clean it up -without a mop
(another don't ask thing)
meanwhile the cats are upset- the kitchen is a nightmare
and i have to figure out how to finish cleaning this up without a mop
but with a full bottle of 'dawn'

oh man.....
when i do it.....i sure do it

so i am taking a break trying to figure out how to deal with this....(and wishing the cleaning fairy would come and  majic it all away) ....
i have to get it finished fast as it's going to smell pretty bad if i don't
and be dangerous with the grease

wish me luck....i'm going in

i am worried about a lot of things---

but not the government shutting down
why?
well cause it's happened before, (thanks donna for reminding me)
and also mainly because the powers that be (ie: really rich companies) won't allow it to go on long as too much money will be lost
never underestimate the power of big big money

so am i worried.....not about that

ok back to our little corner of the universe here
i got that second turkey roasted and deboned, with the meat going to the freezer tomorrow
and the bones simmering again in a stock pot on the stove
we picked up three more breasts on sale so they are in the freezer
bernie told me that the both freezers are full up to the tops and there is NO MORE ROOM
ha
i'm going to get into the upright and defrost it maybe this weekend.... when i do there will be some more room
i also made apple pie sauce
then i made pork with saurkraut and applepie sauce
bern ate a ton of it-
i froze what was left......there really wasn't enough to can even though i had started out with something like 15 pounds of apples
macs, gala and ginger golds
ok if someone wants to make this
i used about 2 tablespoons butter
peeled and cored all them apples....
sugar...which i didn't measure, just keep tasting it
a splash of lemon juice
then about 1/2 a teaspoon of cinnamon (vietnamese....it's the best) and about half that of ginger
a tablespoon of blackstrop molasses.........
and simmer stirring every few minutes for like.....forever!
(maybe 8 hours)
i used one of my round staub cocottes and it was wonderful.....
i had to keep adding apples though, as there wasn't room for all of them until the apples cooked down a bit
it got a rich golden brown color.....translucent mostly
with chunks of apples here and there
tasted like either apple pie filling or applesauce
and i am going to make it that way from now on.. as i can use it with dough for pies etc or with meats

we also got some pie pumpkins which i was supposed to bake the other day but time got away from me
so this week sometimes i will bake at least one

in painting updates: the latest is a polish spring goddess, who is coming along well but i am really looking forward to finishing her as i don't like taking too long with any painting if i can help it
now while i paint i like to listen to classical music ..... and today i tried to burn a cd of a whole bunch of new music
i am now the proud owner of three coasters...... that used to be cd's
dont' ask...seriously don't cause i don't know what i did wrong!
and trying to rewrite or reformat the cd-r just lost me access to the music!

oye

bernie and i have been talking about a new computer for me, to put over by the painting table
or a new desktop here and to take my laptop over there
i've been looking
i may get an all in one.....although i really would like two monitors ......
i am considering going to school in january at our local college (online classes) for photoshop ....if so i want a new computer with a much larger screen before then

what else?
the weather is very warm...we brought in wood just in case but really it's been so warm again---however it's in if we need it

oh and we paid off the van today, which is a year late in being paid off.... but due to bernie  getting hurt at work then being laid off  THE DAY  he returned- we just paid the payments and not too much extra
it's still about 6 months ahead of the actual last payment date but it should have been last year at this time

we're still talking and looking for a diesel vw for bernie....
meanwhile we're still sharing the van
but we do need something as a back up that's better on gas
i told him...'we get you that gazzillion mpg diesel car, and you'll end up with a job around the corner'
AND gas prices will fall through the floor...
cause that's what happens to us

anyway out of all the things i worry about.... the shut down of the government is not one of them
it's not permanent

and yet another turkey breast-tis the season

i roasted one last weekend, we feasted royally...now the bones are in the stock pot
i found another one ....which is defrosting and it will be roasted, cubed and refrozen cooked.
it's bones too will end up in the stock pot
i feel very secure with a lot of stock in the freezer or in jars on the shelf
the leaves are falling ...no real change of color lately, just brown and down

we had a fire one night, i should bring in wood and start small ones for the chill of the morning.
i'm painting a polish spring goddess right now

finishing up a test knit for pinkhairgirl (on rav)

mostly i am thinking of cooking ahead for fall so i can then concentrate on painting and getting the paintings registered and sent to manufactures
i would dearly love to see my crows on garden flags
and some of my other work on tableware
among other products

today bernie is at a managers meeting so he won't be home until early tomorrow morning, it was better time wise with the traffic to stay down there.
i'll miss him

but i am as always...busy so it won't be too bad

ok i have to run -- i plan on eating breakfast before 1pm today

flattened by a steam roller?

tell me that it's so?
cause there is NO other excuse to feel like this today

ok so i didn't sleep (thank you sudafed)
and i hurt from top to bottom (thank you fibro)
no wonder yesterday bernie just put the ducks out without waking me up
i never heard him come in, or go in and out with the ducks...i never heard the water run
i guess i was the dead yesterday and today...i am the walking dead

yesterday we got to town, we got the sale on shredded cheeses.. less then 2.00 a pound so we got like 15 pounds. it's all tucked up in the freezers now. between that and how late bernie slept, i didn't roast our little turkey so that is today

now it rained overnight, which we knew cause we put laundry on the line to dry....
as our putting laundry on the line seems to be the equivalent of cloud seeding or something
we hang laundry and boom! rain........... never seems to fail lately!

i told him that maybe he needed to rethink the cleaning of the chimney which means going up on the roof
but he thinks it's going to be ok
he just told me that we need to use the stove shortly so it needs to be cleaned
i think we also need to get the front chimney and the furnace done too
as back up
plus i am thinking of the eco blocks for the woodstove for deep winter

now watch, bernie is going to be home this winter, so it's going to be super mild, and barely break 30 degrees
with no snow

so anyway, today is sort of muted, through a haze of yawns and painful muscles......
i hope for a real nights sleep tonight (i'll take allergy meds and sleep until tuesday)
not much after making a turkey dinner is going to get done by me
maybe some painting if my hands are shakey

and thanks to vicki ...... the comments are working again
(they still are moderated though)

and winter preparations continued

first off thank you so much vicki for emailing me about what you make for supper and also about having trouble posting on the blog.
i'm going to look into the problem

today i am going to roast a turkey for freezer meals.......
i am specifically trying hard to put cooked 'tv dinner' meals away so i get more painting time during good light
right now i am using the best light cooking
so i am trying to tweek my day a bit
and part of what i am trying to tweek it with is meals ready to go out of the freezer

and also some different stuff then what we've been eating lately
so anyway to that end.... i got a good deal on pork steak at giants,
i am going to go back for more and make some meals with them for the freezer-
i am thinking pork stew, breaded, and maybe saurkraut apple?
cubed for sweet/sour (although that isn't strictly made ahead and freeze)

i am also hoping for that chicken breast to go on the big stock up sale so i can get the 120# and then i am pretty much done for winter food (potatoes are not ready yet, i called the farm)

i also just switched bernie's calling plan on his cell, as he uses it less then 4 minutes a day 6 days a week....
he doesn't need unlimited...... he barely needs 100 minutes
so he's switched to 500
and i am still resisting getting a cell as what do i need it for?
who calls me?
who do i call?
if i go anywhere i am either with bernie or ........... i can take his cell if i need it (but again who am i going to call?)
besides i like the idea of not having a 'leash' and i think of cells as sort of leashes.......from what i saw of them
who wants to be reachable at all times?

in flea news, i am going to reluctantly put the advantage on the cats.....
i'll be getting it next week
these last few fleas are stubbornly persistent and i really am not happy about it
the girls are both under 9 pounds and of course the boy is over 9 pounds
i just hope they are ok with it

in painting, i just started first washes on the newest painting..
i can't get away from blue pigments it seems lately
when this series is finished i want to do a series on the warmer end of the color wheel

in knitting i am test knitting for pinkie....i've had to tink back 374 stitches a row for 5 rows.....
now i think i am back to knitting forward again instead of backwards....
i hope so ....i am at the end of this shawlette ....just doing the lace work and since i couldn't finish the last one for her, i would love to finish this one ..as it is for her book....
i can't wait to see her book ..which is knitting patterns and stories from her neck of the woods (south africa)

today, bernie got home, put the ducks out and then woke me up.....i'm so grateful, as i've been so tired lately- i guess it's the change of seasons.
i got a shower and got up
i had to take sinus meds again though
my head was killing me.....bernie said that it's supposed to rain so that could be why
i really miss him now that he's working graveyard but it's sure better then when he was working OTR
i hated that........
at least with this there is a schedule and we are adapting to it....slowly but surely

ok i have to go start chores for the day
take good care everyone and i'll try and fix the comment thingie

fall weather in earnest....(we ain't kidding around now)

so this week i've made beef stew (sunday)
minestrone soup (i think tuesday or maybe it was monday?)
enchilada casserole (whatever day i didn't make minestrone)
and sausage and potatoes yesterday (which i believe was wen)

today is porkchops but i don't have apples or sauerkraut for it-
so i guess breaded maybe?

and i will say.. i am at a loss for suppers right now

i get like that sometimes, especially when i am a bit low on boneless skinless chicken breasts as i am at the moment.... (waiting for the big sale at the provisioners for the winter stock up)
if we had chicken breasts in the freezer life gets hugely easier....

chicken and dumplings
cordon bleu
breaded with sauce
breaded with cheese
salad
stir fry
casserole
stew
pot pie
chicken with creamy leek sauce (love that too)

we do eat a LOT of chicken, i suppose because over the years it's been so inexpensive and easy
we used to get chicken legs (thigh and drumstick-the whole leg) for .29 cents a pound, so i would get two hundred pounds....... we may grow pin feathers and cluck but i learned how to make my way with chicken
now the same chicken leg is normally about .79 a pound.....wow that's expensive to me

anyway, while waiting for the provisioner in allentown to get the boneless breasts in for under 1.70 a pound, i am trying to figure meals that bernie will eat
he hates beans (which i adore-being raised on them and all)
he hates chili.....for the bean reason
he isn't too fond of a lot of my favorite soups...... wanting mostly cream type soups
he does make an exception for minestrone though with the meatballs and raviolis in it
he won't eat barley (i also love barley) or chickpeas.... oye or lentils........or split peas (i've tried for years to get him to eat this stuff)

so a whole wonderful world of food is out of the question
lovely wonderful meals that are great for fall and winter, stuff i grew up on and adore to this day

so that leaves me with a dilemma as i wish to feed him healthy, seasonally and also with an eye to some frugality.

beef is not cheap.....no where near cheap......
anyway this is my search now...meals he'll eat that also satisfy me for the fall/winter thing

and i can put by so i can continue to work on getting these paintings done

any ideas? (from all 9 people who actually read me?)

i could still use a pep talk

but at least today i am slightly better
the wonders of decent sleep and no sinus headache

we examined the studio roof, as in....bernie went up and took pictures for me to look at
as i tried to climb the ladder but that knee i fell on in feb is STILL bad (it goes out on me suddenly - i fell down the stairs the other day because of that)

i called someone .....we'll be seeing our first estimate/opinion i think this week
i want the stove chimney examined as well

i got my winter supply of watercolor paper in- which is 15 full sheets, (even at 1/4 sheets that is a LOT of paintings 60- but if i get 6 out of each sheet, it will be 90)
i still have some left from spring when i ordered last, however this is the bright white paper not the traditional white ......

i started transferring the next layout and cursed myself for being lazy when i was working on this layout.
especially now that i can't find one of the reference photos i used for it
i SWEAR next year i am getting a drawing tablet and a new computer.
meanwhile i am working on getting the existing paintings all photographed for copyright registration
- i will continue to do this until i get enough done for the batch.
-----------
in weather news here, fall has finally arrived, it's been downright chilly. the cats aren't happy since it's not cold enough for their beloved woodstove and right now they aren't in the bedroom at night either
we seem to not be seeing fleas, but i am keeping up the spraying etc.

i made our traditional 'first cold weather' meal yesterday, in the le creuset 4.5 quart soup pot, it's now our new fall tradition...... it's an event when it becomes cold enough to get that soup pot out, last year i made chicken and dumplins, this year a TO DIE FOR beef stew
i had bought a chuck roast from the butcher on saturday as a treat for us, just a small 2 pound one, but we only ate a tiny bit of it......so i cubed it up fine added the reserved juices, and some broth i had in the fridge, a bunch of veggies and a very long, very low simmer
the potatoes thickened it perfectly and we had a wonderful meal
that is bernie's supper for tonight, and the leftover is my lunch for today
i'm going to make enchiladas for today's meal before he goes to work, with leftover chicken and some sauce i had made a while ago and frozen
i like them with veggies in them.......sooooooooo not traditional but i like them that way so we have them that way

now today, once bernie goes to sleep, i am going to put my paper away better, do the dishes, and the budgie cage. start supper and if i have more time after..... work on the paintings

i damaged one already in getting them ready to shoot-
i need to figure a more efficient process i think
i swear in my next studio i am getting flat files and doing all paper cutting on them....and they will be UP not only on wheels but the cutting part will be waist height so i don't break my back leaning over
(should i be clutching the dirt like scarlet ohara now? )
i could easily use the entire first floor of the house as a studio and still need space ...flat files are huge, but they really ARE the best solution to paper storage
i would get them now but

1) calpurrnia would probably piss on them (good thing that damn cat is cute )
2) i have no space for them
3) i can't decide if i want mayline c or wood......

i actually am planning on getting them second hand, they are often available on craigslist and ebay, and if i go with the mayline c, painting them red!
wood maybe i'll just stain and seal..... my biggest fear is getting them, filling them and calpurrnia (good thing she's cute) will back up and spray all over them.....
(she's getting better but this is the legacy from that jackass neighbor and his 10 un-neutered tom cats that are still running around here- any ideas about stopping calpie from spraying would be appreciated--- oh and natures miracle for extreme cat urine does work)

i actually have had to block of sections of the studio so calpie stays out....my painting area is one part that is blocked off (that was my fault, i spilled the liquid maskoid that has ammonia in it)

so this is the state of the household at this point...
i still could use a pep talk...... but not as badly as i needed one the other day
not quite out of the woods on that yet

oh and bernie's discovered BBC documentaries on youtube! .......
he is watching part of one a week..... (he's only really got like 15 minutes at a time so that's why part of one a week)- and we still haven't gotten to the VW dealer to look at jetta diesels for him either yet.....soon though

til next time.....

i could use a pep talk today

right at the moment i seem to have lost my mojo
partly because i am attempting to get the paintings ready to be photographed
partly cause i am just plain tired
partly cause bernie is exhausted and i am reacting to worry connected with him

we still have fleas...... no where nears as bad, one or two on the cats a day total
but there are still fleas

next week we're starting them on advantage and hoping that it doesn't kill them

anyway i lost my mojo..... i have a layout waiting but can't seem to get it together enough to paint
the paper is up, taped, and ready to go
my water buckets are all clean and filled
brushes are all cleaned and washed
and i am sitting here thinking.... maybe it would be better to forget this

(yes i know, and i also know this won't last- but for the moment.......)

it's turned cold finally, we are almost ready for winter
we still need to do the chimney/stove and get the potatoes and another load of wood
AND fix one part of the roof in the studio (there are three roofs over the studio, we need to fix the topmost one)

now last night i had insomnia so was up reading... from about 1am to about 4am or so
that maybe part of it
or it maybe the weather
or just the ebb and flow of life

but right now .....i sure could use a pep talk

thyroid meds are a good thing

and i got a renew for the next year!
the doc said 'just in case you don't get the insurance'
that is a huge weight off my mind!
but believe me when i tell you, it cost a LOT of money.....

meanwhile winter preparations continue.... leaves are coming down like crazy, which means the first frost isn't too far off
we need a few more cords of wood, 3 bags of potatoes, the 120# of chicken we get in for winter,
i think also, a bag of sand for the duck room doorway, for the ice during the bad part of the winter

now last winter little vicky taught me a trick which we will be using this winter....
MYLAR blankets to cover doors with....i have saved the blankets of course, and we will be covering the doors with them,  i am using the little 3-M clips to hold the blanket up....
i could use the little stationary store clampy thingies and one of the wire curtain rods from ikea (if i could get to an ikea)-- that would allow it to slide but the clip thingies will work too
last year i just taped it up at the top.... i was sort of in a hurry

now the other thing i wanted to do was window quilts, bev down in missouri made them for all her windows and they work great... i was a bit concerned that it would make it hugely dark in here and/or give us a problem with the combustion of the woodstove- maybe we should consider an outside air intake for the woodstove?

i want to bomb and spray the house one more time before we button up for the winter......to make sure that we ditch fleas
which btw, we are going to get the advantage for them this week
we dont' know what else to do...... we've done everything the vet said to do
we've called a few exterminators, two of them wanted us to have yearly contracts with them
one who specifically advertised that he treated fleas.....doesn't! ( i had a long conversation with him about it)
i've gotten a ton of different opinions on the fleas too- it makes my head spin......
meanwhile the cats are running around the house again and boy i did miss them.... they missed the house and sitting on us during the day
they line up to be petted by bernie in the morning
calpurrnia is still not using the litter box however..... the others are


in painting......no, i'm not
i am working on trying to get the paintings photographed however, which is not as simple as it would seem
also to this end i bought some CFL which are NOT cheap..... but have a daylight rating on the KELVIN scale of 5500K which is BRIGHT daylight.. they are used for SAD and also for photography
i suspect that i may be using them for SAD and not for photography although i did get them for take pictures
slowly i am getting the things i need to take these photos with- my goal is to have a standard set up (on the cheap) and take photos monthly then batch copyright them quarterly
i have meanwhile continued to search out agents, manufacturers and publishers who may be interested- recording their submission guidelines etc...

i am so hoping that life is more routine by october
(i also hope we've gotten bernie his new car by october......)

i will say one thing...... having gotten invaded by fleas is a nightmare but we ARE getting spring cleaning done because of it!

so life goes on......
i hope these cooler days find you all well

vi

september already?

tomorrow i go to the doctor and lab to get my thyroid meds renewed.... and also i will be setting up some appointments for the endo when my insurance kicks in
meanwhile i have to pay out of pocket

meanwhile here at home we still have stragglers in the flea arena
damn i hate those things
we moved things out of my studio and moved stuff around then it rained and woke some up
i guess better up and sprayed then waiting but damn
anyway bernie opened up the studio by quite a lot- we had it sort of divided up into four areas with the woodstove sort of in the center.....
where i paint was relatively closed off, so that if i was painting and he was watching a dvd, it wouldn't bother me.
now that whole area is opened up to the center of the studio
the back area that we had my very large, long heavy workbench is also opened up
and the workbench is gone
the good news is that i got my cutting table out of there
which is a folding table so is great for not only sewing but if i need to do other things
i still need more bookcases though....i have stacks of books on the floor yet


we are still looking at cars for bernie, we aren't rushing into anything but we're looking

i am hoping to be back at painting by this week
the photographing of my work is going to be delayed for a bit
due to lack of equipment but i am hoping that is very temporary
meanwhile i am studying photography for dummie books
and lamenting ditching the photography classes at school
"famous last words- i will NEVER need photography or ceramics''
ahem
yeah
oye

ok what else?
well i can't believe it's september already.......it feels so condense this year
i mean it was just yesterday that bernie was leaving for the OTR training....
then the driving job....due to the extreme irregularity of his hours we sort of were living in a fog
we are still sort of ........but slowly are getting used to his having actual weekends off

on to the ducks... today phoebe ate a mouse
it was a baby and i didn't notice it on the ground but phoebe sure did ......
one gulp
i'm telling you all
you have a mouse issue........ you want organic........turn a muscovy loose
no more mice

i followed her out of the duck room asking her 'what you got there phoebe'
then i saw a foot and part of the tail hanging out of her mouth

i got a mouse in the kitchen.....i am thinking of parking a duck in a diaper on the counter...
no more mouse then

well to all who celebrate jewish new year.... happy new year

may we all have understanding and peace the world over this coming year

take good care

sony nex5r

looks to be my replacement camera for shooting artworks
i have rewards points, and it's on sale at bestbuys.com
i have been saving gift cards.... so this won't cost me much out of pocket at all and i am hoping that by monday i can start to upload files to the copyright office for my batch copyrights
then.....
i will start to submit directly to manufacturers
and continue to submit to agents


if bernie is ok...we'll pick it up tomorrow
he's not feeling too good right now
he seems to have gotten a rotovirus

i was on my way downstairs and he was moaning in agony in the bathroom
i dropped EVERYTHING
he wouldn't let me call 911
he wouldn't let me take him to the hospital or the emergency clinic....he really was in that much pain-
so i gave him a huge barf bag and put him back to bed with pedialyte
and checked on him every hour
he's got to get up and leave for work soon
i am making him broth with rice

in neighbor news they had the line 'surveyed'
i called their surveyor who admitted that his crew did it
i called both the surveyors who did our surveys and told them that this surveyor disagreed with them

that is thanks to a surveyor in town that told me to let the surveyors fight it out first
then if that wasn't satisfactory ......get a third one and take them all to court

oye

guardedly optimistic

today it is raining..... pretty steady out
ok so the laundry is getting rewashed and i don't have cat towels so they get a reprieve from the twice weekly baths-- although in a way i think they like them as i get to hug and cuddle them for a while
one on one
then they get fancy feast

anyway......
humidity makes fleas hatch along with vibrations and heat
i have been walking around in the humid house
not too many fleas on me so far
for which i am grateful

i had planned on spraying down here again today and doing the bedroom after bernie left for work but due to the rain i can't (no cat towels- as the house and them need to all be done pretty much at once)

so tomorrow

i am guardedly optimistic that we are through the worst of this- i still feel crawly though
i called bayer, which makes advantage topical flea control for cats (and dogs but i am talking about cats)
they weren't too helpful however.....
so i still don't know if i can use that stuff on mine safely
i think if we can use it.....we are done with the fleas then

just in case we are going to bomb over the weekend and spray around the house outside
i still can't figure out how three indoor only house cats got this much fleas

up next.....i got the research for the batch copyrights done
all i need to finish is a good enough camera to take the photos
mine is old and 3.2 mp
copyright office says at least 5mp
online sources say 12 mp for art reproduction
so i am left with a dilemma........... which involves a new camera
but which one there are slr and dslr
and what features do i need?
oye
i would imagine image stabilization ........
also a way to photograph the wild birds i paint .....from a distance
and then again.....real close ups to shoot the plants i am painting
plus whatever i absolutely need to shoot the paintings
really what you all see of the paintings online here is soooooooooooo much less that what they look like IRL
the differences are incredible

meanwhile
it's pouring out now and i have to be getting the ducks out in it....
they will give me a really hard time as they hate rain
but then the lure of fresh worms just lying around will have them dawdling all over the back while i try to get them into the pens before i am totally soaking wet

random thoughts and phrases

yesterday i make meatballs.....big vat of meatballs... some plain some in sauces
all for the freezer for later
today i'll make enchiladas, maybe sloppy joe meat- possibly more plain bags of chopmeat
then i am done with that for a while

the flea-ness here seems to be lessening ......... i will keep up the regiment though

fall is in the air

i need to bake

the roof needs to be fixed

the chimney cleaned

paintings desperately need to be painted....(they are stacking up in my brain)


the ducks need to be put out right now and the cats need their canned food for the day


like i said....random thoughts and phrases-brought to you by a not quite caffeinated enough vi

fall is definitely in the air

today, i want to talk about fall preparations,
bulk cooking
and the rest.....

it's been blessedly cool.....
(thank goodness cause when it was stinking hot and the fleas.....i was seriously contemplating drastic measures.)
so without realizing it, i am getting ready for winter.
i got a great buy on chopmeat, and some chicken parts
so i am again going to be bulk cooking
today i did just two meals ahead .......beef and veggie enchiladas (i will be making more for the freezer though in the next few days)
i am going to also be making meat loaf
meat balls in three different sauces, tomato, mushroom, and brown gravy (yes all from scratch)
and probably more stuffed peppers and salisbury steaks
i got about 30 # this time so with the bulk raw i put away and some raw patties for fast burgers
i should be ok for beef type stuff for a while
i did the raw chick parts in bulk figuring when i do get to them i am going to do a tray and possibly freeze them cooked
since bernie starts his permanent shift this week
i want to make sure while we are transitioning i have stuff ready to go for him
i still need the potatoes, and bulk chicken but i think we're going to be ok

the other stuff is the woodstove, roof and basement
which is going to start happening in about two weeks
i still need more wood but i can wait a month to get the last of it in
we also have a tree to get down so when the guy comes with the wood he'll most likely do the tree

we are still seeing fleas...... i am so sick of fleas i can't tell you
but i keep on with everything, this week i am going to get more spray and spray again
and then get the precor and do the overspraying so that we are covered with the insect growth regulator

in painting news, i'm not
i did work on a client portal (agent) website
i also fought fleas
i would love to be knitting but i am afraid to get fleas in the knitting
there are still fleas....did i mention that? OMG it's a horror movie
the fleas are so tiny now that they are barely visible
but they bite HARD

what else?
next week we have to go car shopping.... we've settled on a VW diesel....for bernie
we were going to trade in the van but we've decided not to.....
we need the backup with him driving so far

so anyway...that's what's going on here
i really wanted to post about my bulk cooking..... to remind me-
i don't know WHY i like having the pantry and freezers stocked, and why i want us prepped for emergencies and winter and such...but i know i feel so ....... warm and secure when i am
i just DO better mentally when i know we've got stuff to fall back on
(and that did save us while bernie was laid off- all that preparedness and stocking up paid off)

so happy sunday to you folks....
i hope you are all well and i hope if it's almost fall by yous that you are all getting ready

take good care

Fleas-notes on how we are dealing with them

this is what i have noticed with fleas
vacuuming helps big time
BIG TIME
and when you first enter a room they are going to jump on you....... even if you are (maybe) winning the battle
take the time to pick the damn things off and drown them suckers in soapy water
vacuuming helps
if you know it's going to rain, vacuum a LOT ............. and then spray the knockout spray with the insect growth regulator
they are going to hatch with the humidity...... be ready for them little bloodsuckers
gray or light colored pants/socks help see them while they climb you ew.
some are so tiny you can't really see them.......but you see their movement
don't open your fingers to see if you got them.....do it WAY under soapy water cause them suckers are going to jump
you haven't lived until you get one in your bra ...............or worse

the funny rusty looking spots and such in your socks etc........ yup blood
for really tiny insects they do bite a lot
really a lot

allergy meds help with the itching and the crusts and swelling, the welts and white dots i keep getting with these damn bits
nothing helps too much with the burning from the bites

and most importantly
the SECOND you see one flea
call the vet

much going ons

first off, we lost dulcette.
i went down one morning and she was dead.
she'd been slowing down for a while, and it looked like she just peacefully drifted away in the night
bernie took her out
she was the last of our pure orpingtons, and the very first chicken i got as an adult
the three we have left are speckled sussex orpington crosses
when they go ........no more chickens


i am working on my bio and artist statement
and i am putting together a blog for a portfolio, i was looking at website host companies and there are a few reasonable ones
the free ones i didn't like at all
let me tell you, doing an artist statement and bio is NOT easy
not without sounds like........... well....... an arteest......
and i would rather not do that
when i was writing for money, i wrote non-fiction, and how to or historical stuff,
so writing a bio/statement should be easy right???
yeah......right

we had a productive weekend, bernie got a lot of odds and ends done, as did i,
we had to replace the posted signs on our property line as the petty childish neighbors spray painted them BLACK! so they trespassed and vandalized AGAIN......

bernie told me not to worry as when the fence goes up....they won't be bothering us anymore (he actually called me from work on his break to tell me not to worry-and that if i was afraid to go out we were moving right away into an apartment)
he's right as i have way too much going on with my life right now (and usually always) to waste time on stupidity like this

the fleas are still with us..... not as many, and apparently smaller but still there
the IGR i think is starting to make a dent
i gave the cats the capstar and baths saturday but i wasn't able to vacuum the bedroom

in 'prep for winter' stuff, i got a great deal on chopmeat which i didn't expect but it's in the freezer, i am going to go back and get more, this time with the intention of making more meatloaf for tv dinners, meatballs, burger patties, and maybe stuffed cabbage all for the freezer.
i had also gotten chicken thighs, but when we got home and i went to break down the large 5 pound pack we found out that they were rancid! we returned them and got double our money back.
i still would like to get the chicken thighs for the freezer, but i am afraid to now
i still need to get in the 120# of chicken breast, 3 more cords of wood, and 150 pounds of potatoes
(i could also use 4 pork loins to cut up for the freezer)
bernie has the woodstove to clean and the roof to fix but next weekend he's got work stuff to do
the weekend after i suppose we will be going car shopping for him....
a little diesel car, it will go forever on very little fuel
we are hoping for a used or year end...i would rather not buy a brand new car at the moment

bernie being home daily plus two days a week has made a huge difference already in our lives-
he likes this new company
i was told by someone that knows this company that 'they work them hard, but they give them a lot of paid time off, and a lot of other benefits, such as profit sharing'

in painting news, i have a layout waiting..
i hope to be back at the board soon
the fleas have a lot to do with me not being back there

the other thing which doesn't sound like much but is actually huge, is sunday bernie and i went out!
just to the pet store and the grocery store, but it wasn't a rush rush rush.....
no stress involved. we had whole wheat pancakes for breakfast, i made the batter and he cooked them (which reminds me i have to grind flour this week and make bread)
it's amazing what two full days off and a dependable schedule will do for your life

i will say though, with bernie on second shift for a bit, i don't eat! ......i cook for him but it's too early for me-- which reminds me......i haven't eaten anything besides a small plain hamburger - and that was like 1pm! it's almost 9pm now
i did have a weird craving for generic cheese doodles last week, bernie got me a small bag and it took me three days to finish it-what was that about?

now my friend lotta in sweden posted a quote that struck home with me- i put it below,

As you begin to move into a higher frequency and live in the light of your true spirit, sometimes lower frequencies that have been in your life will sense this and try to drag you back down. This may show up in the relationships, past or present that do not operate in love or serve your spirit's growth, or just people behaving badly when around you. When this happens you might feel assaulted or attacked. Rather than react, fill yourself with love and extend it toward all people in your life, and especially those who cause you pain. Ask your guides to assist you in raising and holding the vibration to unconditional love for all. The negative others will either rise up and feel their own heart and transition into love, or retreat and leave you in peace. We must all do this now. As a race, we are being asked to respond to everything with love. This is our highest purpose in life.

~ Sonia Choquette
www.soniachoquette.com

and i think i am going to listen to my friend lotta in sweden...... (who is a knitting sister to boot)
as seriously i am too busy working with the current series of paintings and looking forward to the next,....if i want to get them finished i don't have time to divert to stupidity

so thank you so much lotta.... i owe you big time

ok now
i am going to post this and investigate if blogger has a template for artists
take good care you guys
(for the 7 people that still follow me)

fleas, rain, buses and dreams

first off on monday bernie started his new job, he's got a week of orientation and then he has his crew and shop and works nights.
i am trying to find a way to get his tool box down there for him, as he's got no time right now

in flea news......we still have them in every room except it would seem, the bedroom....
so as of this morning the cats were still clear of fleas since monday--yeah!

me not so much
also a moth of some sort laid eggs on my sleep tee! ewwwwww and we won't go there

it's all this damn rain
i just retreated the living room/stairs
i also did a dumbass thing this morning....i vacuumed without putting a bag in the vacuum..... well i wasn't awake
i had a plan..... vacuum the upstairs, the stairs, and the livingroom/kitchen
spray.....
retreat into the studio.... vacuum that
when living area spray was safe..move birds into living room and spray studio
and saturday or sunday rebath the cats and capstar them again..... to make sure they stay clear of fleas
now i am afraid to use the vacuum as i am afraid it will cause a fire
although i did clean it best i could
i have three hours until bernie is going to call home (after work- he is so happy to leave his cell in the van for now)
so i have to wait to ask him

i also treated an old urine stain from calpurrnia ....... so that should also be fine by the weekend


now onto dreams
i dreamt that we built me a mega studio
OMG
40X60 and two stories..... with floor to ceiling windows on the north side, HUGE barn doors of glass that rolled out of the way to get big stuff in and out
two sinks
a bank of flat files for paper and painting storage..... plus a paper cutting area, print shipping area,
a loft for books and office space,  display space........be still my heart!
three separate painting areas, an etching press and a book binding press
and a small kitchenette, as well as a half bath with shower
it opened onto the house kitchen (up two stairs and through glass doors)

i dream good don't you know......i also dream BIG

for the record....i hate fleas

and how, i ask you, on earth do three house cats get fleas
that then explode into a plague worth of moses in eygpt (i was told it was from the rain)
how?

and now i look like i have a cross between chemical burns and impetigo
with a bit of poison ivy looking stuff thrown in for good measure
and it's all from flea bites

!
now the vet gave us capstar and knockout es
but yesterday we got the knockout bombs and bombed the crap out of the house
all the birds including budgies were outside in the days pens
the cats in crates in the van with us
(we also bombed the van)

today i am still getting a few bites here and there......as the stragglers i suppose die
meanwhile it's raining
so yup that means more fleas
meanwhile
i am exhausted with about 2 hours a night of sleep
and itchy
really really itchy
to the point of bleeding itchy

have i mentioned i hate fleas?

homemade 'tv' dinners revisited

yesterday, i spent the day in the kitchen
i got a surprise sale on chopmeat so i put up a bunch of stuff
sauce for spaghetti and sauce for pizza
salisbury steak
meatloaf
stuffed peppers
hamburgers
smothered pork chops (got a deal on boneless pork chops too)
today i took out a pork loin roast so i am going to do 'tv' dinners with pork loin,
brown rice pilaf and mixed veggies
i am not sure yet how i am going to cook the pork loin for this but i will by the time it defrosts

i've been looking for the divided foil trays and found them on amazon (250 for 87)- i only want about 50 of the trays though

anyway, i am tired from cooking but it's a wonderful feeling to have all that in the freezer

in other news..we are thinking of trading our kia in for a vw diesel
most likely in about another month or so
i'll miss the kia but we need something much better on fuel
i plan on another van....most likely another dodge caravan.....
i liked the kia for the amount of time i actually got to drive it but the problem with the warranty and the dealership soured me a bit on kia

now for those of yous that have pets....and those pets have accidents....
nature's miracle urine destroyer....

no i don't get paid for this
and oh boy does it work!

ok  i have to run now
i am treating the main floor for fleas (which we still can't figure out how we got since the cats don't go out)

yarn, paint, fleas, cats.....oh my

 okey dokey, first off.....here is the yarn i dyed yesterday- i am casting on a metalouse from stephen west (free pattern on knitty) in a KAL with luann
margaret had sent me a cone of fingering/lace a bit ago and this was off that cone...i dyed the multi one first
first off yellow while the skein was still twisted
then a deep wine color after retwisting the skein...
then adding literally two drops of blue to the remaining wine color on top of a knotted skein
the leftover purple was for the second semi solid skein (which somehow manages to have a tiny couple of dots of bronzy red on it anyway)               you can see it here while i was first drying the dyed skeins and then caked-- none of the pictures show accurate colors though but i swear, you could walk into a room full of hand dyed and pick out my skeins as my am so very loyal (or set in my ways?) to my favorite colors ---- my knitting sister lotta in sweden was so sweet comparing my skein to malabrigo's archangel-- she sure knows how to make someone feel good huh?

next up...painting- i finished the second reindeer herder and then did an inuit story about a woman and her son the polar bear- i have to cut paper again then start on a few more........

the fleas? well my INDOOR only cats who have NEVER had fleas in their entire lives......have fleas
so every other day we bath the cats and try to vacuum the floors
meanwhile it is exhausting me
i can't quite get them to the vet atm......so we are bathing cats
i have one more cat to go yet today...... i will say however that i am seeing less and less fleas, and they are smaller so i guess we are making slow progress

bernie had a day off yesterday, they still owe him another day off so i told him.......'hold the one they owe you in reserve and just take weekly days off.... '

meanwhile he put the ducks out for me yesterday and cleaned crates too!
we need to stock up on hay again and two new bales of bedding for the ducks.......
we still have enough to the end of the month though

well right now i am tired and still have one more cat to do
til next time

who EXACTLY does 'lawncare' in the middle of the night?

apparently people who don't want to be video-d while they are vandalizing an adjacent property!

ok a friend sent me this following funny by email
and boy is it apt to me--- i hate lawns

God and Lawn Care...

GOD:

Frank, you know all about gardens and nature. What in the world is going on down there on the planet? What happened to the dandelions, violets,  milkweeds  and stuff I started eons ago? I had a perfect no-maintenance garden plan. Those plants grow in any type of soil, withstand drought and multiply with abandon. The nectar from the long-lasting blossoms attracts butterflies, honey bees and flocks of songbirds. I expected to see a vast garden of colors by now. But, all I see are these green rectangles.

St. FRANCIS:

It's the tribes that settled there, Lord. The Suburbanites. They started calling your flowers 'weeds' and went to great lengths to kill them and replace them with grass.

They go to great pains to grow it and keep it green. They begin each spring by fertilizing grass and poisoning any other plant that crops up in the lawn.

GOD:

The spring rains and warm weather probably make grass grow really fast. That must make the Suburbanites happy.

ST. FRANCIS:

Apparently not, Lord. As soon as it grows a little, they cut it-sometimes twice a week.

GOD:

They cut it? Do they then bale it like hay?

ST. FRANCIS:

Not exactly, Lord. Most of them rake it up and put it in bags.

GOD:

They bag it? Why? Is it a cash crop? Do they sell it?

ST. FRANCIS:

No, sir, just the opposite. They pay to throw it away.

GOD:

Now, let me get this straight. They fertilize grass so it will grow. And, when it does grow, they cut it off and pay to throw it away?

ST. FRANCIS:

Yes, Sir.

GOD:

These Suburbanites must be relieved in the summer when we cut back on the rain and turn up the heat. That surely slows the growth and saves them a lot of work.

ST. FRANCIS:

You aren't going to believe this, Lord. When the grass stops growing so fast, they drag out hoses and pay more money to water it, so they can continue to mow it and pay to get rid of it.

GOD:

What nonsense. At least they kept some of the trees. That was a sheer stroke of genius, if I do say so myself. The trees grow leaves in the spring to provide beauty and shade in the summer. In the autumn, they fall to the ground and form a natural blanket to keep moisture in the soil and protect the trees and bushes. It's a natural cycle of life.

ST. FRANCIS:

You better sit down, Lord. The Suburbanites have drawn a new circle. As soon as the leaves fall, they rake them into great piles and pay to have them hauled away.

GOD:

No!? What do they do to protect the shrub and tree roots in the winter to keep the soil moist and loose?

ST. FRANCIS:

After throwing away the leaves, they go out and buy something which they call mulch. They haul it home and spread it around in place of the leaves.

GOD:

And where do they get this mulch?

ST. FRANCIS:

They cut down trees and grind them up to make the mulch.

GOD:

Enough! I don't want to think about this anymore. St. Catherine, you're in charge of the arts. What movie have you scheduled for us tonight?

ST. CATHERINE:

Dumb and Dumber', Lord. It's a story about....

GOD:

Never mind, I think I just heard the whole story from St. Francis.  

we have discovered the joy of enchiladas

AND experiments with tortillas will follow....................

actually bernie and i talked about how much the enchiladas i made last night tasted like pot pie!
so i'm thinking...... WHAT IF????

what if i use tortilla for the 'pastry' of a pot pie?
i'm thinking it's worth a try no?

lately i'm doing total dinners to freeze, in addition to all the other stuff we have raw or partly cooked in the freezer
it's helping when he has to be gone on a two day trip.
he can take it and just reheat it at whatever terminal he lands at
and days when either i am not doing too well or i am painting a lot etc...... we can just heat up supper

i used to do things like this when i was working outside the house, because i never knew what time i would be getting in, so it was easy for bernie to throw something in the oven and eat, saving me a plate.

with his new schedule, we never know from one day to the next what is going on so this will work well for us too.

meanwhile i am working on the reindeer herder, she's almost done, i am not liking her as much as the last one....but we'll see when i am finished with her
i may redo her
originally i saw her with a tattooed face! but i didn't want to paint her that way, sometimes i think she's gotten back at me for not doing that by giving me a hard time painting her

i am considering the next in the series as well

and that is our little corner of the world right now......(yeah i know--- abrupt change of pace but hey)

muffins

i bake muffins at least every other day or so, in this pan-
bernie takes two of them a night and has them for his 'breakfast' at about 6am or so, when he's delivered his last load-
(i pack him sandwitches, a banana, and two muffins along with his thermos of tea every day)

today's muffin is banana oatmeal, with cinnamon and allspice
sometimes i make him blueberry orange, or carrot pineapple, strawberry etc........
all of them include oatmeal, along with freshly ground whole grain flour, two duck eggs (thank you my beloved muscovies) and sometimes coconut, granola, and 85% cacao chips....
depending

his favorites are the blueberry, the banana and occasionally the carrot ones.......
i experiment a lot, and when i have apples he'll get apple in there, or apricots, in the fall he gets fresh pumpkin ( i get small pie pumpkins that i bake ahead)

i feel a bit better about him eating them since they have oatmeal, whole grain flour, cinnamon, olive oil and fresh fruits in there - i am not crazy about the sugar in there but he wouldn't eat them without it
i tried

anyway, i am trying to find some other different muffins for him... stuff that is fast for me to bake as i throw this batter together in two bowls and in ten minutes then bake for 20 minutes

it has to be fast cause it's in between everything else i do
so i have a bit of time to paint around chores.

i am considering sweet potato muffins in the fall...... we'll see
i didn't plant zucchini so they are out

really i would like a rotating roster of maybe 10 or 15 different ones
and then i plan on a baking week to stock them into the freezer

any ideas?

ok here is the basic muffin recipe
now mind i don't actually measure

1.5 cups of flour
3/4 cup of sugar
1 teaspoon baking powder
1/2 teaspoon baking soda
1/4 teaspoon salt
oatmeal..... about 1.5 cups ( i grind it up a bit too)
cinnamon ......i use vietnamese and i use about a tablespoon or so (probably more)
dash of allspice
dash of ginger occasionally (usually with the carrot muffins)

mix that all up in a bowl really well-- if you are adding granola or chips or nuts or raisins add them here

in a separate bowl
1 cup or so of milk ( never measure) to which you added tablespoon or so of lemon juice to curdle the milk
 2 duck eggs beat the daylights out of them before you add them to the wet stuff
(or two HUGE chicken eggs but the duck eggs are much better)
1/2 cup of oil (we use olive oil)

then the fruits
3 bananas mashed well
or about 1.5 cups of grated carrots mixed with 1/2 a cup of crushed or chopped pineapple
or 2 cups of blueberries with about 1/8 a cup of fresh orange zest/juice
if you want to use molasses throw in about a tablespoon or so here

mix the wet ingredients thoroughly--- seriously do all your mixing here
the put the oven on at 350

now mix the dry into the wet until JUST combined....don't over mix
there will be flecks of dried stuff here and there
that's ok
fill your muffin pan and bake for about 20 minutes
test with a toothpick - if it comes out clean- take them out of the oven and let cool a bit
then cool on a rack

these are wonderful ............ and bernie loves them (so do i but i don't usually eat them, preferring to save them for him)
he said with a bit of cream cheese he's in heaven

so there you go
let me know if you make them ok? and if you experiment let me know what you did

i hate lawns

 if you look carefully in the center of the photos there is a baby fawn... out back.
see the baby?
it's momma was browsing out in the second backyard and left the fawn safely in our care.

then bernie mowed the front and side yards
and disturbed a nest of baby bunnies... i didn't see if he'd gotten any but we did have scared bunnies running around like crazy and now they have no weed cover......or food

needless to say i am upset
i am upset that the asshole neighbor got away with forcing bernie to mow- at least while the baby season is upon us
here i have tall weeds, that are alive with bugs, birds, frogs, toads, bunnies, fawns and other living creatures ............ no chemicals are dumped..... mother nature rules as she should

it's so worth seeing a tiny new born fawn still wet struggling to stand
or watching a cardinal pair raise their little babies in the rhododendron right outside the front windows

now if i had a say, the lawn would so be jettisoned and just stands of native wild plants would be there.... i may reserve a small patch for beans or something like that..... but really i can't see the sense in a lawn. trees........yes absolutely even dead ones.... our native animals get short shifted these days by stupid developers, even stupider homeowners, invasive non-native species, and overly aggressive application of chemicals- to control our native plants!
and then people get mad at me!

the neighbor said our property was a 'shithole'
i don't understand that....it's alive with all sorts of wonderful life...... see that baby fawn???
does this mean that all these birds, and animals should be killed? that their habitats should be annihilated? because one uneducated person thinks that i need to listen to their opinion of what MY property needs to look like?

this is america?

just some odds and ends

first some observations:
karma is the universe's loving way of allowing you a second (or third or fourth) way to get it right

we all are learning..... but i suspect while we're at it..... we are teaching and setting examples-and some of that at times could be divinely inspired (or whatever your world view of the universe is)

watching ducks bath quietly in the dappled sunlight on a day that is not too hot, and not too cold is one of the good times, even if you get splashed a little - or splashed a LOT

sometimes, you really need to come down on the side of kindness, even though you get shit on for it,
because, you understand the deeper problem. that doesn't mean you are a victim, you can defend yourself...it just means that you don't go any further then that.....no retaliation, no 'teach them a lesson they will never forget' .............

destruction seems to always be followed by CONSTRUCTION, both in housing, nature and human experience
i didn't say any of that was easy, or pleasant, or fun-- although it could be

now:
i am back painting, when i paint, my brain goes into some odd sort of meditative mode, sometimes it's 'out there' seeing the universe from a different vantage point, sometimes it's asking some 'big' questions, and getting some interesting answers.....
i think that's why i keep painting too, because for me it's very healing to be 'out there'
i really do feel better after a few hours of painting
i also find my world gets into a better (most of the time anyway) balance
unless of course the painting is not going well

i've started the reindeer herder/ elen of the ways in earnest now
and let me tell you every part of this has given me a hard time
studies for the aurora borealis (which i also learned to spell properly during the research) took a while
finding her face took a while (the face she kept showing me kept changing)
researching reindeer took a while
then i dreamt the process
which actually worked out a bit better then i thought .....(with the exception of too much 'starry' maskoid)

i am actually on to her face now

i found myself scrubbing the watercolor just like i used to scrub the oil paints.....
adding hazes of transparent color not washes..... but hazes
i'm thinking that may not be a traditional way of doing watercolors........
don't get me wrong, i also use washes...... some very wet juicy ones......but i let them dry a bit then i've been scrubbing over them with color
i'm thinking that is probably part of who i am as an artist, since it's something i've done with oils, acrylics and now watercolors

in addition i've been listening to audio books lent me by a friend.
the only time i can listen and hear them is while painting!
not while knitting or doing housework or in bed.....
and i'm not in a car much so not there

at this point...... this is about it for this post, if i think of something else later, i'll update (most likely in the observations part)

just a fly by posting

since that incident yesterday, roland the dove hasn't been back
we fear something has happened to him
but we still put out some bird seed for him
i didn't sleep at all
so bernie is putting the AC in the bedroom today
he didn't sleep at all yesterday either so maybe this will help him

i decided that due to the extreme hot weather.....i would make sure all the animals are kept in and cool

in painting news.... i am closer to the layout of the reindeer herder
i still mourn the loss of that thistle as i have that second goldfinch painting for susan to do

it's so hot here
the heat is way too much for may/june......it's more like august heat
i also noticed that another big maple is dying
i am thinking that it's in the water that fed that one and the 300 year old one that died already
we need to get the well checked

and a filter on the drinking water i suppose
it's all a bit overwhelming at the moment