bit better

i was up most of the night, i just couldn't get comfortable
fawn helped me by sitting on my pillow all night
i didn't have the heart to move her so in addition to achs and pains (getting old sucks as does dental stuff) i had fluff on my head...... so i was getting night sweats too
but i wouldn't move her
she was purring loud enough to vibrate the bed !!!

this morning thaddeaus cut loose with a loud and extremely LONG demanding meow in bernie's ear when he bent over to add wood to the stove
thaddeaus wanted his fancy feast and he told us so.......
normally he does that to me
but the boy realized that i couldn't bend over so dad would have to do it
oh and when fawn got up.....thaddeaus got into my arms and put his paws on my shoulder and slept that way
i should be glad he decided not to walk over my face like he usually does
oye
calpurrnia was a good kitten and slept on my ankles....

now today it's dark and overcast
bernie is still home thankgoodness
we have to finish up my studio or no drawing or painting will be happening here
we're trying to put my drafting table up on casters so that i can move it out of the way.......we're also trying to do that without putting any holes in the oak legs (this thing is as old as the hills, heavy as shit, and was given to me by my dad)
there are a few other things that need to be up on wheels, a book case, desk, two file cabinets and a long workbench
i think that the custom room plan stuff is going to be moved to the living room and some of the stuff in there will be moved out here
i really need the walls painted or white washed or something in here though
it's so dark in here
and not just today cause it's dark out...... it's got that dark paneling
and i'm going to paint it!
well i'm off now
i am starving and need to make some soft stuff for me
i got to go back on december 13 for the other half of my mouth
i thought it was being done in 4 seperate visits but it's being done in two
thank goodness
cause the anticipation was killing me

after

i'm home
the novacane is wearing off

the folks there were extremely nice, supportive and caring
good thing cause it hurt like hell
the extraction was the easiest part, the dentist just cut something and the tooth popped out...no pulling either
the initial injections were killers
the lady said cause they were near the nerve bundles......yup i can believe that
and i had a lot of problems cause i have a very small mouth, it's hard to get in there to work

oh man
btw, the dentist had a tree up and all
and he did the tree himself.
i was very impressed cause that tree was NICE
not overly done
not sorta half baked
he nailed it
that tree was perfect
the decorations were the right scale and the right placement

i saw a hawk too hanging in a glide over the meadow beyond.
i couldn't see too well as i had my computer/reading glasses on

right now bernie is getting the RX for motrin filled
i took two tylanol arthritis though in the meantime
good thing i ate

as the shots are wearing off i can feel my teeth and gums ache
but i think it may not be as rough? i hope
the extraction i am praying won't be rough cause when he got that tooth out boy i could taste and smell the blood and the infection up in there

anyway i am in my nightgown
and i am waiting for bernie to get back to take the ducks in for me
i think it's going to be a very early night tonight for me

studio cleaning

among other things
bernie is helping
a lot of the 'big' work is done, the endless sorting and labeling
he moved the second big shelf over to the north side of my studio
i am wondering how i got moved out of the brightest (lighting-wise) side of my own studio?

calpurrnia got a tick on her yesterday, yup, winter is here.
i washed small throw rugs and have them hung drying one is out and one is by the woodstove
we'll be bringing the hoses in today as soon as they thaw

i suppose winter is actually here now
the solstice is around the corner

my watercolor area is about ready again, however i don't really have a doll making area now.
i need to do that again, as well as my 'general crafts'
i been thinking more and more of how i want the duck drawings to go
interspersed with stories is how it has to be, along with facts and of course the black/whites mixed with the color work
i think i need to make a feather border too maybe? we'll see

this morning phoebe was very happy btw, she was eating ice chips... she LOVES ice chips
think 'duck potato chips'
oye
so now her beak is bright red!
she is also a bit shivery, ahem....... phoeb??? stop eating the ICE
oye
oye oye
this week is the first surgery
tomorrow
oh man
i am hoping i can function enough to sit and draw, if not
i will be up in bed, trying to read
now the last bad oral surgery i had i was 21, and was so sick for a month (two surgeries two weeks apart on wisdom teeth)
i couldn't wear glasses so i crocheted a rainbow colored granny square blanket
red, yellow, blue, green, purple, orange with black borders
it's around somewhere as it was red heart
this time i am thinking i may just sleep
we'll see how bad i am
right now i am listening to youtube.......pink floyd dark side of the moon
i miss thea right now, so pink floyd, yes, zepplin.......all remind me of her

also i signed up for an online dream seminar on the 8th..... someone remind me ok? at 4pm
cause i remember dreams from when i was a little kid
i dream in full color, with taste, smell, touch etc...some dreams i found to be prophetic, some are stories (they actually unfold like movies- i like those kind a lot too) but all are remembered..... a lot of them vividly... a few of them in bits and peices
so when that online seminar thing came through and it was free i was sooooooooo there

gee my studio looks so empty!
oye
ok off i go for a turkey bagel

thanksgiving is over

ours was extremely subdued.
i didn't even bother to clear the table!
we sort of ate next to each other while bernie watched something on the computer
we also ended up with half of what i had planned for our dinner.
no acorn squash stuffed with apple pie filling (home canned apple pie filling)
no pumpkin pie as i didn't bake that pumpkin

just turkey, gravy, mashed tators, rutabaga, stuffing and a salad

i still feel terrible about thumbprint. bernie does too.
just terrible
i know that his aggression was partly my fault
cause of his being hand raised ( i really did think he was a girl at first, and i guess i should have let nature take her course when he wasn't eating in the beginning but i couldn't help myself, i just had to feed him) but malcom was also hand raised (not like thumbprint though) and he is so far acting like a normal drake, he stays away from me and the herding stick.
i did have to yell at bernie for going into his pen without the herding stick
now i want NO ONE around the drakes without herding sticks.
although falstaff still is the best drake in the universe.....you just point and tell him and he does what you ask.
i suppose i'll settle down eventually, it's still very new

we didn't hear from the family so i expect over the weekend.

and i'm downstairs now at this very dark hour because bernie is snoring and calpurrnia is wrecking the place.

i have to say though, i have been having horrible terrible feelings lately
it may be some depression, which i get around this time of year anyway.....
either way i think it's escalating
i am getting broody (not like a chicken)
i am brooding over bad stuff that happened and i am not sure how to stop it
it's not as horrible when either i am out with the ducks or at the drafting table
or talking on the phone
but all the rest of the time it seems i can't get away from my own thoughts

i miss my parents and my friends who have crossed over.
even though i do occasionally see them i still miss them
i miss having the family close enough to visit
while colleen was here last time it was magical...... we all sat at the table at night and laughed and talked, we felt surrounded by golden light
i hope that colleen and raymond when they retire move up here.

also yesterday was our first snow, it started while i was putting the ducks out, and didn't stay long
it was mixed with sleet and freezing rain then just rain
the babies were not impressed and spent the time in their little pond
i switched out pens between falstaff and the big girls and he spent time in the pond as well
he shivered but he took a few baths
he really is an exceptionally good drake, i suppose i am very lucky with him, as he was feral when i got him.

today bernie's home
i hope we will be stacking wood
he is got monday, tuesday and wednesday off this coming week as well
my surgery is monday
i am dreading it

i am hoping you all had a wonderful holiday yesterday
at the very least peaceful and restful

the day after

no one slept last night
not me
not bernie
not the cats either
in fact cats kept walking all over me all night and sniffing at me, pawing at me

i put malcom in the back part of the big pen again
and the little girls in the front part of the big pen
so far malcom seems like a perfectly normal drake
not exceedingly aggressive......nothing like thumbprint

i missed a few spots of blood in the back pen, the girls didn't however.
they investigated it all
i did put down fresh bedding after i hosed it all out

a lot of folks have been calling to make sure i am ok and i am pretty grateful for that.

i put up the turkey (finally) that should have been finished monday into the stock pot and plan on canning it as soon as i can
i need to do more dishes

bernie felt pretty bad, as he really liked thumbprint, and if any of the ducks were his, it was thumbprint.
he thought he was a really neat little guy
meanwhile i am living with the 'what if's' and the 'where did i go wrong with this creature'
and of course the ultimate 'what the hell did i do'
and it's never easy coming to terms with having taken a life
but at least when you raise something for that purpose you have a lot of time to deal with it
and you sorta are ok with it

i have realized that i will never be a person that takes a life callously. That i have a very deep reverence for life
however i also do realize that i know there are times when it has to be
that with the best available knowledge i have at the time.....sometimes that is the answer
i also realized again
that as much as i hate it
i am strong enough to make really hard decisions........or maybe it's what i want to tell myself.
the only other alternative would have been to basically put thumbprint in prison, solitary confinement.
that isn't a life for a flocking or herding animal
and so i go over and over and over in my head

now i am trying to put something together for us for this holiday
i am conflicted as to all the stuff going on in my head

i know i cried really hard again last night, when bernie got home and we talked about this
and i know, i didn't sleep
so i guess i am still human right?
that this bothered me and bothered me deeply, in spite of folks making a joke out of it
now maybe they made a joke out of it because it bothered them?
(however that would be poor taste no?)
i hope it did bother them just a tiny bit, as i kind of think that it should, just simply to make sure a person still has a bit of compassion left
no?

ok folks you all please have wonderful holidays ok?
and let me know about them
so i can live vicariously ok?
take good care

vi

thumbprint is dead

he got way too aggressive today, climbing the chainlink fence, and i realized that if he got out, someone in the neighborhood could get hurt, seriously hurt so i called one of the uphill neighbors to come shoot him.
which he did
i don't feel good about this
however it had to be done

it took me a while to gather myself to go and clean up the blood
i did however, and it wasn't easy either
but it had to be done as well
i let malcom out into the full pen
poor malcom saw the entired event as i couldn't get past thumbprint to get him out before thumbprint was shot

i keep thinking somehow i failed thumbprint
and i feel bad i had to call the neighbor to shoot him (as he was so bad i wasn't sure the vet could even handle putting him down)

but then this person made a joke about it
and a bunch of other folks joined in with treating this like a joke

so my already nightmare of a day turned even worse

today it seriously sucks to be me
not only did i fail that little guy somehow
but now i am a joke, my pet is a joke

and i am very angry that a life is gone and that life was treated as a joke

monday again...... gee didn't i just see you 7 days ago?

we won't talk about the weekend
ok we won't talk about DUCKS and the weekend

specifically thumbprint...... who is going to go into the freezer ASAP
or the bloody bandades we got all over us
he's so over the top with teenage raging hormones,  that he's getting dangerous

we ate the last of the beets from the garden, bernie naturally hated them
i was so happy with them they are soooooo sweet
i blanched and froze 11 packages of broccoli from the freezer (from a big sale at the store, as the groundhog ate all my broccoli)

today i have to finish the thanksgiving card to my MIL and mail that, can the turkey, do a SHIT load of dishes (thanks to bernie and his bringing home three BAGS full of dishes and containers he'd left at work)
and i didn't sleep
so i finally got some this morning which means i just got up a bit ago

so my day is going to be a nightmare
and i still have to deal with that drake

why is it?

there are tons of things in life i don't quite get.
i don't quite get politics
i don't quite get lying
i don't quite get hurting other people just because

today i don't quite get all of the above and the need for calpurrnia to wake me at 5am
but then i digress

right now i am being over ridden by a fear of this tooth stuff i got happening on the 29th
i live with a lot of fears actually
some i can sort of keep in check and some skyrocket out of control at 3am
i worry a lot too
i worry about bernie
the global economy
maintaining our health and freedom both as an individual and as a country/world
i worry about the cats and birds in my care
i worry about this little house too

now i don't know why i worry as much as i do
i figure part is the disease(s) i have (one causes the other and the other like a chain of dominoes going down)
and part is from observation of things around me

now i'm pretty sure i'm not alone, so how do you all deal with worry?

i was reading about misconceptions that are generally believed by americans
i was appalled at the lack of critical thinking that leads to folks swallowing that without any objection
actual downright stupidity!
i remember being told by someone older then me in ALL seriousness
that Obama had gone to hawaii to seal his birth records
ahem
there are a few things wrong with that statement

1. hawaii is a STATE, so if the man was born there, ahem, he is a citizen of our country
2. birth records are always sealed period, you need to prove you are either that person or somehow connected to that person to receive them

now those two things alone should have clued folks into the fact that the 'obama sealed birth records' thing was not quite the truth.

i shudder to think that there are people in this country that will lie ......OUTRIGHT lies publicly in the limelight without being called on it

ok now on to this week cause i can't deal with the fears anymore
i need to get to the post office
i have mail going out
i need to pick up mail coming in

and somehow through it all i need to find some ambition to get some stuff done around here

anyone have any ideas on that?

thanksgiving cometh........closer, and closer and CLOSER

i can't believe it's the dying of the year (or the beginning of the new year if you are pagan)
meanwhile my insane brussel sprouts finally decided to sprout!
with 1/4'' sprouts so far
so what? put the plants in the ground in JUNE next year?
plant them in pure compost? feed heavily?
oye
switch varities?
it's november .........doesn't the brussels sprouts realize that?
oye
mother nature is SO not watching the store.

ok i am behind yet, still........ yeah like that's news
i got most of the dishes washed after trying to dry out all my day pens
i got the baby girl ducks out finally
i managed to get the drakes out without them hanging up on my legs
and managed to get them in as well!
amazing
i did not kill one baby drake yesterday either
unlike sunday when thumbprint looked like a goner......

i can't get the woodstove going AGAIN
no kindleing today

now i plan on clearing the table and getting the good dishes out with the good silver and all that for thanksgiving
plus a tiny bottle of wine for bernie
i ask you
how long do you think we'll linger at the table?
italians linger for hours
when colleen is here we linger for hours
bernie eats and gets up
huh?
35 or so years married??? he's practically italian, most of his cells have mingled with mine
he GETS UP? from the TABLE?
oye
so i am thinking why bother with the china, the silver, the wine?

but i may do it anyway, i'll see how i feel on the big day

how about you all? any traditions you folks have?

rain today

and no more cesspool woes it looks like
only cost 500 bucks!!!!!!!!
but we're going to have the roots routered out in the spring (from the pipe and a new pipe put in i think)

i made chicken breasts with creamy leek sauce with penne except it was rotini as i couldn't find the penne
it was good
bernie liked it
then he spilled koolaide on my WOOL felted hand made purse
oye

yes it's stained

now today it's raining, and my body feels like a truck hit it, dragged it, backed up over it, and hit it again.....
my teeth hurt too

meanwhile bernie brought me home a ton of containers and dishes etc that he'd left at work
so i got dishes all day to do
gotta love him right?
cause i am not big enough to drag and hide the body

meanwhile the baby drakes were good boys yesterday
oye
so maybe it was just that they THOUGHT since bernie didn't correct them immediately that it was OK TO BE aggressive to mom too? but by monday all things returned to normal so they realized OOPS......MOM MEANS BUSINESS..........
?
oye
now lillianna is growing flights in so is bitchy as hell
phoebe is not too pleased either but no one is fighting
amelia and prudence have decided that mom is great and that 'we love mom to pet us'
that's a huge relief as i was worried that they would NOT come around
but they did
now if i could ONLY get all four girls to not fight and to be friends
it would make my life a lot easier

other then that
i suppose the stress, dread and pain from all that is coming with the gum surgery (not to mention the current pain) has me so i can't knit, i can't seem to paint or draw without mishap
oye
today i plan on digging that latex out of that end of the studio and reclaiming my work area
after i do the endless dishes that is

yeah, that's today
after tylanol
i hope

ewwwwww

cess pool issues again
this time it is a clogged pipe and looks like it's going to cost us big

meanwhile i have to sit by the phone waiting for their call, as they will sandwich me in between other jobs

so now that was our weekend......... how was everyone elses?

it was warm this morning, in the high 40's so i didn't light the woodstove
i did however notice jackass neighbor (remember that ass?) last remaining abandoned un-neutered tom cat in the yard today......
they are gone but their legacy still lingers on like a malignancy

i am still trying to clean up the latex in the studio, still trying to get the omph to knit, still terrified of the periodontist on the 29
still out of sorts

next week is thanksgiving....... we may be having DUCK if thumbprint doesn't settle down.
he decided to go for me sunday...... so we had more drake discussions.....he's a persistant little monster
and to think i was worried about him LIVING?
more like i am personally ready to cut off his fool head myself

we got that new log rack, it's really nice, holds a lot and is sturdy
it's a bit too close to the woodstove however for my comfort
i do however like it a LOT.....so much so that i am thinking we need to get a second one for on the deck..... slightly bigger.... it holds a 1/4 face cord, so one that holds half a face cord would be good for the deck i think....... and they do come with covers too!

bernie has decided that he doesn't want that horrible candied yam with marshmallow thing that he normally eats on thanksgiving!!!!!
(who are YOU and what did you do with bernie?)
we are going to have roasted sweet potatoes!
i am going to miss my mashed for the gravy but that's ok

this year we are most likely going to roast a 21 pounder and then can a lot of it
i have two in the freezer and i think i can get one more free one.....i hope anyway.
we are getting hit with some extra expenses that i didn't anticipate with the cesspool/pipe thing

meanwhile today bernie has a new guy starting, Ismael! i kid you not........ without the whale! naturally when i heard his name i had to ask about the whale....
thankfully bernie doesn't remember moby dick so he won't say anything that this poor guy hasn't heard a billion and two times.

in just odd little tidbits, i found the text of the book 'what dreams may come' that the movie was adapted from..... i found the complete text online!!!
cool huh?
so i got it up and i am reading it
HERE is the link
i was originally looking for the image of the toy theater that is in the daughter's room when robin williams has his scene with her and the chess game.......
i ran across the book online and naturally couldn't resist reading it
so i am reading that on and off
and i am also reading "Good Wives: Image and Reality in the Lives of Women in Northern New England, 1650-1750"   by Laurel Thatcher Ulrich
and a few cook books (bread bakers apprentice, a book on soups etc)
did i mention i love used book stores?
i am going to see if i do have books to trade for cause i want more how to's and cookbooks

well it's almost 9am, and i am drinking my coffee
i have given the budgies their food and water, and given the cats their hot fancy feast with olive oil and probiotics
i need to get the hellion ducks out next
most likely taking those damn baby drakes out one by one
oye
MEN
have a nice day everyone
and if you all have time
talk to me about what your traditional thanksgiving 'must haves' are?

a touchy woodstove

and a lazy sunday morning.......well sort of

today we have to stack some wood
and do something in the studio
as i spilt that white mask the other day and made a huge mess.
(then since latex reeks of ammonia, thaddeaus peed on it all)
oye
meanwhile the studio is starting to think about defrosting
the woodstove is giving me a hard time
oh and the new woodrack...........GREAT holds about a 1/4 face cord
just we have no place to put it!

hahaha
oye

so meanwhile i am drinking coffee with my wool hat on and my layers of sweatshirts etc
yesterday we went to a new to us used book store
i scored a bunch of cook books, a few knitting and craft books and a book on goats
bernie scored a couple of books on WW2 history which he loves

yesterday thumbprint decided that bernie was his 'bitch'
hahaha
we had a discussion with thumbprint last night.... in drake speak
(which involved wiggling his butt while holding his head down and then hoisting him on his back in the air which he did NOT like at all)
today we will be hiding me while bernie takes the boys out so i can see if thumbprint learned
and if bernie learned........
cause bernie needs to remember how to handle them.....remember my gum surgery is coming up and he'll be responsible for them for a few days

now being the wonderful loyal wife that i am (i can't even type that with a straight face)
i laughed hysterically hearing about how thumbprint wouldn't get off bernie's leg
then naturally had to point out that me the 'little woman' had no problem with any of the THREE mature drakes here
and that they all obey and get the hell out of my way when i tell them
hahahaha
oye
somehow i am thinking he'll never really make a farmer
or even a country boy......
he's always going to be a city boy at heart
although his latest woodpile looks well stack if not well covered

let's see, in budgie news..... the love affair between captain cuttle and emma is still going on but has settled down a bit.... last night all the girls were hanging together while captian cuttle was reduced to romancing a ring toy.
i have got to get the other two boys soon........
i would like a violet factor pied, and i think a bright lime green or a pastel lime green
that is colorful enough i think for this cage
i have to say i do so enjoy them and their antics, and even though i didn't tame them, i love to listen to them talk and watch them interact
they need new apple branch perches too, i should cut them today while i am out there (and thinking of it?)

bernie remembered i was looking for rutabaga for thanksgiving and picked two up the other night for me.
i had forgotten i had asked
that made me feel so much better
i really was upset with him for not having that four day weekend....he's so tired and he needs a change plus we need stuff done around here that i need help with
so he's agreed to take black friday off, as well as the following monday, tuesday, wednesday........as i have the gum surgery on monday.
(no i am NOT looking forward to that, it's the first of 4)

i am getting a box of stuff together to send to a friend's son in afganistan, i got toothpaste, qtips and tpaper so far
i am going to get to a cvs or riteade and get some stuff too
i would like to send chap stick, zinc ointment
goldbond, hard candy, playing cards..... and other odds and ends
kevin is going over by spring it looks like so i should get one together for him too
oh and i broke down and texted that kid
he does worry me
oye

well it looks (and feels) like that woodstove is starting to catch, i want it hot enough to clean the chimney if i can get it up there
and the studio temp has risen 2 degrees now......... bernie is going to start breakfast in a few minutes
and after i have some work to do in there

have a nice sunday you all

a bad mishap

i was working on that painting, just starting to do a color layout (which was not working btw)
and spilled an entire brand new bottle of liquid mask or frisket
oye
now here's the thing about frisket
it's a latex, and reeks of ammonia
and it's better to let it dry and then pick it up
so i did
meanwhile we discovered that the former homeowner painted the floor with a water soluble shit brown something or other
latex is also water soluble
what a mess
now as you all remember i have cats
three cats
all naughty cats
none so naughty as mr thaddeaus peabody................
who promptly peed all over the papers that i covered the mask with
so now i have mask, papers and peed to clean up
and the latex isn't completely dry yet
plus i am out of mask
and i am thinking
that this painting hates me and doesn't want to come to live
?
oye
meanwhile i think the mishap was caused by my very large, very heavy but totally beloved drafting table, which i can not move easily........no wheels
(another 'bernie will help' that never happened.......)
so i need wheels and a leg cradle or something to get this thing mobile
and then i need to refigure the studio yet again due to the woodstove

and mr PEE body is sitting on the floor right next to me, trying to make up to me for peeing all over the latex
oye

oye oye oye
oh and for the record........the watercolor paper didn't stretch right anyway
UUUUUUUUUUHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHGGGGGGGGGGG

now we have delayed errands.
bernie was sent to the PO with the inducement "perhaps your title is there"
ha most likely not but thats ok
i did all the duck water etc last night so all he has to do is walk 7 ducks OUT......... they will walk on their own two feets
while he follows with food bowls and closes the pen doors behind them
how's that for easy
i'll be getting dressed

so susan, i hope it isn't echo-y in here.....i posted, it's a crappy whiney post but it's a post

to end this a bit lighter
amelia (she was called bigfoot until her gender became more then obvious) loves her momma and wants to be held a lot......think lilli with gray and brown feathers
prudence likes mom but isn't sure she wants holding yet
all this while lilli is telling mom that mom is a female doggie......without parents
cause lilli is growing in flight feathers in this late molt from hell
but at least the two sisters (lil and phoebe) aren't fighting too badly

and i can't wait to sit and draw ducks
maybe after i get this mess cleaned up

maybe i should think of a tabletop easel
or a french easel without the legs (cause the french easel has the draw that pulls out to the front, more convenient for someone without a lot of space no?)

i'm thinking that the wood is wet

cause i am hearing hissing in the wood stove.

ok i am laying out a new painting, which may or may not happen.
it's santa in his workshop.......sorta

you all saw the old guy (yup it turned out to be just a study, but i sort of thought that)
i was thinking, if i was that toymaker..... what would i want to be surrounded by?
THAT question lead to a LOT of google imaging......
so i started a digital file
(yup this is how i work in color)
i got images of wing chairs and sextons
toy theaters and fireplaces
night skys and art nouveau windows
draperies and brandy snifters (no i don't drink but i figured an old guy that traveled the world would)

and as i type 'old guy' i realize that he is about my age! hahahahaahaha oh man-funny how it's the other person that's OLD

and colors, ok deep rich wine reds, glowing ambers, dark icy blues and greens out the window lit by stars and snow reflection and inside glows from the fire
polished wood
aged leather
deep and heavy velvet draperies

ok so that's what i see in my head
now as to what is going to happen on paper......well we'll see

ok so that's what i am involved in now

and you?

been busy......... you all better miss me

so much for a 4 day weekend

it never happened....... two day weekends rarely happen
i am up and started the woodstove or i'm TRYING to start the woodstove
it apparently does NOT want to start
cranky vi
cranky morning
cranky woodstove

i also don't want to go to the periodontist on the 29
which bernie not only forgot but probably won't take off the days he promised me he would to help me after the oral surgery

oye

i got that chicken stock all done.....it's the same color as good apple cider....a deep amber color.
i have so much to do today between the kitchen and town...... stuff i didn't get done saturday
and yesterday turned out to be all day just to pick up chickens

ok i think i got the woodstove started......
first thing this morning i must go to the post office
after chickens and ducks i have to do dishes and process meat and make some pickles
i am going to plan a shopping trip tomorrow i think
depending on how much i get done today

meanwhile due to the road call and chicken run
i've eatten processed food and now am exhausted.......NO ENERGY
so it's going to be interesting

i am still trying to get the house warm, i didn't know why bernie didn't throw a log on the fire this morning
oh and i have to bring in wood too
oh man
i better go i am behind before i ever got started

da pot da pot ***

***da STOCKPOT !!!!
da chickens da be in da stockpot all nice and cozy.

we got chicken stock
i got them stewers going
unfortunately i am still sick so the ducks got out late
i got my stock going though
i didn't eat much yesterday but still had 'issues' this morning

i think it's got to be viral as bacterial i think would have passed so to speak already

meanwhile i will attempt to stay vertical long enough to get something done today.

i got enough wood in for today and part of tomorrow but i need to get an indoor woodrack
it would help big time
and no more lost mice UNDER the wood on the floor huh?
makes sense no? then please tell me why i put it off for 5 years?
i'll see what lowes and home depot have, but i may end up ordering from amazon simply because they deliver.

anyway this one is short and maybe sweet as i have to try and get vertical and get something done
maybe i hope
wish me luck

take good care everyone

fast fast

cause yesterday i was sick and got slow slow so am behind behind
oh boy
before the rain comes back i think i need to get the wood in no?
and the ducks out
i had an 'issue' with malcom........ gee am i tired of testosterone right now
i felt his little beak on the back of my legs while i was trying to close off the back pens
his 'love taps'
when i got him, his head was in the mud
i also noticed that thumbprint's back was all muddy
hmmmmmmmm

malcom did end up in the air....... he wasn't happy and i got a stick to herd him with
damn boys

i really need the new pen finished and now i need yet another pen

in other news i am behind in cooking, cleaning, chicken chores and a mole is running around the basement that the ducks and the chickens have not caught yet

everyone that promised me help with chores naturally (my nephew specifically) didn't show up
bernie is working this weekend so wood stacking looks like my job totally
oye
he's also moving his shop to bethlehem this coming week so maybe he'll get home earlier then 9pm?
7 would be nice
6 would be better, his base day is 12 hours...he works from 6 to 6 but 6pm usually is more like 7 or 8 pm....
on salary so that is 60 base hours a week........
no comp time
plus 24/7 call
no down time

he's exhausted and when he drops dead the company he works for is going to be shit out of luck
they need him
he needs them
it wouldn't do any good to anyone to kill him off from exhaustion
i don't know if he'll listen to me
i doubt that they realize it (or believe me the ceo and pres would put a stop to it..his company is wonderful when they do realize something)

meanwhile thaddeaus just puked breakfast all over the place so i gotta go

ttyl

and stewers are in the cooler

but naturally today and the rest of the week is rain rain rain
just warm enough to not get good draft
cold enough to need a light fire
did i mention it's raining? so the wood won't be dry if i take it in today
(i am struggling to light the fire)

bernie found one of my halloween mugs that had gone missing somehow, i saw it this morning.
it was my favorite with the witch on it
today, if i don't go out with jen ( i owe her, as we didn't do her errands yesterday) i have dishes to do
lots of them...
i just did them all .........so i don't know where they all came from
last night i did a roast, so that will be either sliced for tonight or cubed for stew
i have some other meats to do and then the stewers
oh and it looks like the woodstove finally took!

i been thinking after 5 years of woodstove, when i get too old to do the wood (like last week)
we had better put in a duel fuel stove that does biomass such as pellets, corn, etc.
it won't cook though
a good biomass stove that has a soapstone surround and can be cooked on would be good .....really good i think
so would passive solar....
so anyway back to chores
it seems like that's all i do anymore ......chores
or entertain family
or errands
i do love duck and chicken chores (not mucking but grazing them and stuff)
i like some of the gardening...... harvesting it wonderful most of the time

maybe right now i am a bit tired and a lot overwhelmed at what still needs doing?
i have to finish putting the garden to bed and still some garlic to plant
i have to clean the chickens and the basement
i need to tarp the back pen run
and i could really use some help finishing off the duck pen plus some inside pens for the ducks to be kept seperate
it would be more efficent to have a long bank of pens that are connected huh?
oye
i need a jack of all trades that works for cookies

speaking of cookies, my kitchen aide mixer is shot
so i need to find a new mixer
now kitchen aides are not good anymore
not the new ones
and a hobart (who initally made kitchenaide and is the gold standard) cost 2035$ for a 5 quart
so that's out of the picture ( and they do come in RED too .....shit)
i want something that can beat the cookie doughs and take the big batches,
i would like a tilt head if i can get it
and i would like bigger then 5 quart if i can get it
does anyone have any recommendation?

part of the issue with the cookies last winter was the mixer wasn't taking the doughs
i struggle a bit every year but since bernie broke my kitchen aide it's never been the same, even the repairs sucked on it
it sounds like it's about to fly apart even just creaming butter

anyway, i am sitting here drinking my coffee, watching the fire on and off
listening to the budgies chirpping morning songs to each other
it's about light enough in spite of the rain to take the birds out

prudence and amelia are so cute when i put them in the basement, they keep asking me to put them in with the boys, but i can't now.....the boys jump them
so i spend that short time talking to the girls and telling them they are good girls
this molt for them isn't as extreme as lilli and phoebe's molts are this year
so they will be coming around to tame faster..... they are starting pretty good now

ok i am going to finish this coffee and read my email
ttyl

waiting for the sun to come up

it went from black to gray-ish and i am waiting
i have to get everyone out early today as i am going to pick up doomed chickens for whacking today

(retired layers who are going to be stewers)

i put amelia and prudence in the basement last night with our chickens..... so lights out was early.
they get the front of the big pen today and the bathtub (yesterday was boys bath day)
who said that duck ownership was easy? it certainly is mobile!
and feather filled! since with this molt there are feathers all over the place!

i got a good fire going in the stove now. it started up quickly without matches this morning, that is always a plus
now today after the chickens ( and whatever errands jen is dragging me around on) i will have time.
i am hoping that during this time
i accomplish the following

1. box for the unit in afganistan
2. socks finished for jen at spirit trail (yup had to rip them out)
3. a section of the studio gone through and papers shredded
4. thanksgiving baking started
5. a new mixer acquired

wow, i realize that is not a huge list considering what all really needs to be done but it's what i got now
i also would like the woodstove looked at by a professional or at least me and a 'professional' who i won't trust as far as i can throw them
i think it needs resealing and it's not air tight any longer

bernie is in bethlehm today, his company is donating a wheelchair lift equiped van to someone .....he'll tell me more later
he's supposed to be making the full time move to this office in about a month
i hope so
as he's so terribly exhausted right now i am actually worried about him

ok my beloved chicklets
it's light enough to see my own hand outside
so i am going to get dressed now
and finish my coffee........

you folks all have a nice day

today is tuesday

it is election day, i had intended to vote
i got my card and all
then found out that i don't know who to vote for
!
oh man
from what i can see not one of them is worth the air they are breathing!

oye

now the other stuff i gotta do is get the title to the white van for bernie (send it away to harrisburg)
i got more wood to bring in (*told him to leave what he tossed on the deck for me today)
go to the pet store and the post office

i want to get a leslie sansone dvd, i have one from like the 80's that i used to use daily (and did a jane fonda one every other day with it)
i can't get out to walk so i have to do it here, and since the weather is getting such that i won't be out to the garden a billion times a day, i am figuring a daily walk aerobic thing should be started
and we should probably move the 'entertainment' thing to the other room (the entertainment thing is a joke, it's a 20 year old 15 inch tv, with a vhs player and a cheapo terribly balky dvd player.... see what i mean.....we don't actually have tv so that's that)

now this morning when i came down, the studio was still at 67 degrees but the stove was nothing but ash
i am stacking and burning it now
took a bit to start up
i am blowing through wood right now though, and i realized that i needed to get at least 6 more cords so i can have them stacked for NEXT season........as the dryer the better for these stoves
even slightly damp or green isn't good at all......now explain that to bernie please

speaking of whom..... he needs a vacation.....a true rest until he's bored
he won't listen to me
but he's sounding bad, he has a cough he can't shake (got me worried sick too)
and he's getting like 4 hours sleep a night
saturday he almost rear ended some guy who was making a left, then he forgot the headlights on in the van during the DAY, then he did something else that had me upset but i forget right now what that was
all stuff that is silly but due to him being sleep deprived

even when he's gotten home early, he gets calls in the middle of the night....... by crews by accident. but that wakes us up and it's not so easy to go back to sleep then

well so that's today
more or less
i am trying to figure a better way to keep the ducks seperated out
now that the babies are hitting puberty
oye
teenaged ducks......
adult ducks with pms......
oye
oye
did i say oye???

oh my......my poor little blog

susan reminded me ......i forgot you!

ok so
saturday was fall stuff ......winterizing chores!
storms are mostly in
ac units are mostly out
wood stove blanket it is
and i lit the first fire last night
the second this morning
halloween was quiet.....not like normal which was good actually
cause normally bernie screws up halloween big time
this time it was just sorta of very low key on his part

today i had to finish his chores and bring the wood in, which i did sorta
he didn't stack the deck nor the studio so i am going to be bringing in the wood all week it looks like
now if i have to do that...it's going to again cut down on my knitting time
as well as other things
cause it takes me forever to do wood......bernie it takes 20 minutes me it takes 20 hours or so it feels

i found a deceased mouse in the basement...... i don't think the chickens got it
even though the chickens are turned out to EAT the mice.....
colette is thrilled to be able to follow me around now....and get picked up often
she's not going to be happy when she's got to go back in the day pen full time again

the baby ducks are feeling their hormones
and today i took the boys to the back part of the back pen leaving the girls in the front part of the back pen
(thank goodness for two parted pens that have a gate to close or open)
the boys were not happy
the girls were happy until they realized that the boys couldn't get to them ......then the girls where not happy either
ducks
can't please them
and now they are too old and tough to eat them

i am watching my woodstove while i type this, it's got a hot and lazy fire in it
i need to put a bunch more wood in but for now i'll wait until bernie gets in

tomorrow i have to get a new title to the white van, which bernie sold....
get cat food in town
possibly a rutabaga and a pumpkin
i think something else but i forget
oh and i ordered an 8 quart stock pot...... with shipping for 37.98
all stainless, with an encapsulate bottom from zwillin/henkel (you know......the knife people)
for boiling pasta!
now tomorrow with luck i get stewing chickens for NOTHING! which will be processed on wesnesday!
(chicken whacking wesnesday!) i am hoping for at least 6 but i could be getting 7!!!
now that is an abundance of stewers.........all slated for the canner!

i could get about 15 gallons of stock out of them birds or more....plus meat
i would like that
and i have the big stock pots to help out too!

i also got the green tomatoes but haven't had time to pickle them yet
maybe wesnesday.......?

oh and my nephew is going to be leaving for some military training so he can get sargent..i had to read it on his FACEBOOK page, i'm crushed.......sniff
but i am still planning on keeping him in cotton socks when he deploys
oye

ok off i go
bernie is almost home