as soon as the sun comes up

i hope to sit down and do some work

if i am still blocked, i am going to just do some color charts

i still have town errands.....po first
but we'll see

over the weekend we got duck crates cleaned.
i got myself soaked when i was hosing out the crates, and the hose slipped..
it's all bernie's fault i got soaked (it's my story and i'm going with that)
since he had WARM water on for the duck ponds......and it took a bit for me to register that i was getting WET....as i was finally warm!

see how i justified that?


now in other news, we ran out of wood.....(just like i said we would .....so does someone tall with glasses listen to me???? )

i have to call the wood guy today i suppose
we scrounged around out back and picked up some dead fall and some logs we'd cut off some downed trees and i am burning that right now but i sure would like a nice big load of split logs right about now


i uploaded a beginning of the hawk i am going with...and some photo's of my studio helper for this week.... (fawn is taking a break) ....little blue eyes has been talking to me and hanging around with me almost non stop lately......so here is her 'helping' mom

oh i also ordered leek seeds and (since i've been lazy and behind on starting) leek sets.....
the garden still has some leeks and some chard, carrots, garlic and onions in it...
i am about to add more leeks, carrots, spinach..... it's been such a mild winter

ok the light is coming up.....so i have got to go

take good care everyone

soooo down to the wire and i've got writers AND artist block

and a materials problem....my paints keep chipping off the duralar
add to this all the rain, the spring fever etc
and we have one unhappy artist...with a gapping hole in her book

however knitting is going swimmingly! i finished the cream and sugar cowl in record time...out of sunna from spirit trail in a deep red/maroon color that works quietly with my charcoal wool town coat
now i'm back to the gold fish shawl
and beading
then i'm mopping up the UFO bag
in between drawings

i also had an epiphany.. about my art school and my education- i don't remember a watercolor class!
if there was one...... i didn't take it
so i have been learning stuff on my own through trial and error......
well i finally figured out that i needed to look up information on maskoid and boy was that amazing
turns out i was on the right track but i picked up a few tricks along the way- which saved me a LOT of money that i would have wasted on ruined papers
1) winsor newton makes a colorless mask that is good for 'soft' sized paper
2) frisket paper needs to have the edges sealed with white mask
3) soap a brush and then dip it in the maskoid
4) 140-300 pound paper resists the mask damage the most
5) there WILL be damage on the paper surface from the mask ( here i was kicking myself silly)

now some of the trial and error things....... the use of the toothbrush to splatter mask so it acts like snow... yeah i reinvented the wheel there.........
and i had an inkling that i could mask some colors out......say in the northern lights but i didn't do it
the ducks i ruined....... i should have used frisket...and sealed the edges with white mask instead of painting them all over with mask

so now i am wondering.....what else could i have possibly missed by not having a watercolor class in art school....
i remember we did oils
and got full instructions in etching ( gees i love etching...i would so love to do it again)
but we only got a smattering in 'water' mediums......and that covered acrylics at the time
they treated watercolor as paintings poor half sister
and basically ignored it
we did get instruction in gouashe... but only in commerical art

oye
either way it's all good right???

someone want to please tell me that?

still busy

still drawing (scrapped the last one but did a much different one....and now i hate hawks)

still trying to come up with a card line....
that's not easy for me at the moment (once i dig into it though it will be....that's how these things always are)

i do need to talk to someone who can tell me about die cutting machines that i can program myself to cut around my own designs and drawings
as well as cutting basic shapes out of chipboard

in other news, the weather here is getting a bit warmer
and we've run out of wood....JUST like i told bernie we would
we burn 5 full cords a year here due to antique windows that seriously need replacing
i need to find yet another wood guy
the last one had good wood --- great wood actually but his '3' cords was more like 1.5 cords
the guy before him had 3 full cords but his wood was shit

can't i find someone who has full cords and good wood for a fair price?

anyway..... i also have spring fever BAD....seriously BAD
so bad i am thinking of making a terrarium and sticking frogs in it!
or putting up the fishtank and getting fish! (we have no room for either)
although maybe a hanging terrarium without frogs would work?

so far i have resisted both impulses.

i've also did some sunscreen research...only to find out that my current one is woefully inadequate.
so i ordered new mineral sunscreens online...these have zinc.
i would rather have had titanium
i have to order the nanomicron titanium and make my own i suppose
and the new standards appear to be 18-20% mineral particles
ok i can do that

so chickies there it is....i haven't abandoned you all....i've not forgotten
i have been absurdly busy
dealing with normal household issues and trying to hit deadlines....as well as a reticent hawk that was quite a great deal of trouble to capture on paper

right now i am struggling with my aversion to color in my work- i do need to do some color work
but as usual.....i start and think...... 'this is all too distracting from the image'

hahahaha
oye

happy happy V day to you

me? well the muse struck again..... but something tells me it's going to be a LONG long drawing....
i have three layouts on the drafting table and this one i actually like..... the others i like the IDEA of.....but i don't think they work for this story.......

this one however seems to my eye as the 'right' one

we had a good weekend....... bernie got some of the studio done....i worked on the duck manuscript and next i have to scan work that is getting printed up for the meeting i have to schedule at the end of the month

so for now......this is what's on my board for the next while........

maybe i should have curled the wings forward a bit more???

OYE

happy heart day to you all

1977

on this day.......we were married.

no one thought it would last
we didn't think so either
things were very rough for us

but here we are
still married.......still in love
we've had our ups and downs...........

somehow we continued to love, learn, grow.........

i've discovered strengths i didn't know i had
he's learned he can be strong and steadfast

we've built a life just the right size for us two

and bernie, i love you more today then i did when i married you
and i know (cause you told me yesterday) that you feel the exact same way about me!

happy anniversary nooggums.......

newer work

however i don't know if i like it so i am redoing it!
i already have the second one on the drafting table
and have plans for a third plus color work

now this weekend (our anniversary) bernie decided he is going to help me with the big stuff in the studio
which is a very good thing.....however it also means down time.
which i really don't have time for
good thing i already have a decent backlog of paintings ready or i would be even more worried then i am normally
i am however seeing this project wrapping up. which is always sad but it a good thing too. that means it's almost complete! and i am thinking about what is coming next
no i'm not totally sure yet
i'll see after  i have the meetings with the potential new client- as if i get that account, well that changes what i will be doing,  won't it?

i would imagine however that a second book will be in the works as i doubt i can stop myself.
there are more stories and more drawings
so maybe another one no?

ok so i showed you mine.....now show me YOURS.........

FINALLY a night's sleep!

we drove the new van around a tiny bit yesterday (food shopping ......woohoo what a wild life we lead!)

bernie adjusted the seat and now i can't use the brakes without breaking my hip!

ok so back to the drawing board so to speak

right now he's doing wood
and we are running up to get a new dishwasher in a bit
then i can do dishes (the new one won't be installed for a while) and then maybe draw?

in duck news.... both little girls are laying, and both little girls loves them some momma.....
and amelia gave her daddy duckie kisses last night (she nibbled his hand and jacket cuffs- remember now these guys can and do bite.... they have serrated beaks and a small tooth on the end of thier upper beak- she was so soft and gentle that it tickled and not a scratch on him)
you know....i really do love these ducks so much, they are so much better then dogs
even with all the PMS they do have and the rapid mood swings and the liquid manure.......
well i do love them when they are sweet

did i tell yous that due to getting points back, i threw the van on the CC?
hahahahaha
yup i did
and paid it off already
i love stuff like that
and the reward points...... well i could get a new camera or a temporary car port for the new van

it's cold out today here... ice on the ponds, but i put falstaff out anyway, as he's been doing so well lately.
bernie is bringing extra wood in and i have the stove stoked

i cast on a new shawlette i nicknamed the 'goldfish' shawlette.....it's the bright yellows/golds/oranges of  goldfish
so i am putting aquarium plant bright spring green beads on it... and also further up, aquarium blue beads....it's fun!
it may be my last shawlette for the winter....we'll see
i still need to do mittens and hats and a few sweaters

in studio work, now that i have the new van.....i plan on getting some of the things i've been painting printed.
i have to source large envelopes of about 4'' wide by like 16'' long... with a cello window would be good too
but really the best would be right now to get back to work
oye
i hate interruptions

next week is our anniversary...we've been married since 1977
bernie said the sweetest thing to me this morning

he told me that he loved me so much more now then when we married......he said that he loved me then but NOTHING like the way he loves me now.
i guess i grew on him like a fungus....hahahahahahaha
actually i do know what he means
he's my family
i do remember blood family of course..... but it seems so far away to me now.
and really the only constant for way more then half my life has been him
we have ups and downs.... but we've managed somehow to stick it out
and we've grown as people
i couldn't ever imagine life without him...... i don't know where i leave off and he begins!
and sooooooo many people never ever thought we'd make it.....ha

(and it was while getting his anniversary card that i got a new client lead!)

oh and one more thing..... getting the new van while totally traumatic for me (i soooooooo hate change) actually worked out better, smoother, and all around easier then i ever expected!!!!
it's just that i really hate change....
and my old van had seen me through thea's illness..... dad's, kisses........... it had hauled sheep, ducks, chickens and pigs......along with hay, plywood.... etc
it took us to rhinebeck, out to the farms....... and to KY and VA to see family and get thaddeaus....
there are a LOT of memories tied up in that van

but i guess the new van will make us new memories... and rhinebeck won't be a problem at all this year
possibly even MDSW .......we'll see

ok folks til next time....... and there are pictures of some of the girls for you folks to see

and tomorrow is the big day

we pick up the new van
i am very excited as i know that i can get the animals to the vet, get to the doctor
get to rhinebeck etc without worry

meanwhile i have been busy. drawing yes
writing ........ahem ........well yes i have been

doing housework......yeah not so much
knitting .....well i did caston another forget me knot ....this time in goldfish colors
and i need to make a decision about the beads for it.....FAST
i have a spring green that would work but i would prefer aqua matt

you know.....to look like water and pond plants.
well i have a bit of time, so i may go and see about getting some aqua matt beads

in duckie news..... falstaff has come back from the nearly dead!
he is so old, and the cold was bothering him
but yesterday he was his old chipper womanizing self
telling the girls how he was thier stud muffin!

poor malcom is getting a complex!

meanwhile the little girls are taking time out to graze, and i am encouraging that as they are laying.
the big girls are still fighting
my discussions with them all is going something like this:

'MOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOMMMMMMMMMMMMM- she touched me' (this would be phoebe)

'I DID NOT TOUCH HER MOM, SHE is LYING' (this would be lilli)

girls stop fighting (this would be me.....)

~~~ sounds of honking and feather flapping~~~~
GIRLS STOP FIGHTING.....

i'm going to get the hose
ok i got the hose now cool off  ~~~ sounds of water being sprayed on fighting ducks~~~~

ENOUGH

'mom i loves you the best'  (this is from both of them once i separate them)

AAAAAAAAAAAACCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCKKKKKKKKKK this is me being frustrated

oye

at least the little girls are getting along.

now i had planned to talk about lofty things like 'free will'
and 'respect for other's choices'

in light of the Komen foundations move to defund planned parenthood
i am very angry with Komen now...as planned parenthood was the ONLY help i was able to get when i had the bilateral lumpectomies in 02... we had no insurance and bernie was on workmen's comp and CRUTCHES having gotten his leg blown up at work (we really should have sued the company for negligence)
no one would talk to us or work with us..... planned parenthood was there for me
they arranged the mammogram, ultrasound, stereotactic biopsy, the bilateral biopsy, and the follow up care...they paid for it as well since we did NOT have insurance and had exhausted our emergency fund as bernie had been out of work for three months on crutches with daily PT.

unfortunately in america, health care is taken as a privilege not a right- and the result is.... people die
people are disabled.
and health insurance companies are getting wealthier and wealthier ( maybe we should all invest in shares in the insurances?)

i don't know what the answer is....... i think maybe germany and finland have better health care models that we may want to take a look at .......but in the meantime
we need organizations like planned parenthood..... or more women will die of breast cancer from lack of access to care